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The only constant in all your failed relationships is you.
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Thank you for validating my decision to leave you by becoming a complete psychopath.
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If you were a dinosaur you'd be a Skankasaurus.
bdm7505/22/2012 5.00 (3 votes) -
TWINKLE TWINKLE, LITTLE WHORE, CLOSE YOUR LEGS, THEY ARENT A DOOR.
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When your ex says 'you'll never find .. anyone like me' reply with thats the point?
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We all know how misserable you are about not having a significant other. Stop broadcasting it on social networks, desperate is not a pretty look.
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You're Not Good Enough To Be A Full Douchebag...So You Shall Be Called Douche Nozzle.
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That wasn't bad cooking, that was arsenic...obviously not enough though.
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Look it's not you it's your penis.
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I never thought I'd see the day he'd leave me for a WHALE.
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You know, it's weird. I want to fuck you but I kind of wanna punch you in the face too.
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Honey, don't hate me because he chose me over you, hate me because he doesn't want you back!
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Here's a toast to you, for breaking my heart. Here's a toast to me, for not breaking your face.
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I'll see your silent treatment and raise you a fuck off.
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Porn, helps.
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Thinking of you gives me happy thoughts, like wanting to throw a hockey puck at you.
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Here's to never having to scratch your forest of a back anymore.
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I didn't join an online dating site to date, I joined it to stalk you.
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Tell him I can't take his call right now. I'm washing my hair.....in the sink????
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Don't be mistaken, Darling... I'm A bitch, Not YOUR bitch.