For your birthday I wish you multiple orgasms.
Congratulations on getting knocked up and your imminent marriage based on guilt.
Now get it right this time or I'll break you other arm.
I'll told you I'd touch it if you touch the dishes.
I'm not a lady in the street but I'm a freak in the bed... even trade?
I'm so glad you had that last beer, now my sex dreams can finally come true.
Fine, I wasn't really washing my hair, I was bleaching my asshole. Don't judge me.
Let's ditch our friends and have some real fun...
I want to take you behind that farm house and smash your pupmkin.
I'm so glad I bleached my asshole; this is definately going somewhere tonight!
Next time, I hope you shit your pants and have a stoke.
I'm sorry that your boyfriend is jealous of our friendship.
I think your cute, wanna go in the closet and play with this one together?
I sure am glad I remember to jerk off before I came to work today.
I know you're upset, will smelling my panties cheer you up?
I'm sorry but if you ever want to get married you're going to have to stop reading comic books.
Take the sandwich I just took your man, it's the least I can do.
