Get Well User Cardsshowing 81 - 100 of 5,051
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  • Heard you came down with herpes... ...Get well never.

    Heard you came down with herpes... ...Get well never.

    Jeff192031306/13/2013
    4.50 (2 votes)
  • You're the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo.

    You're the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo.

    Kelly332567105/25/2013
    4.93 (14 votes)
  • 'Safe!' 'Umm, you're on a horse dumbass, not a baseball field'.

    "Safe!" "Umm, you're on a horse dumbass, not a baseball field".

    Kelly332567106/05/2013
    5.00 (2 votes)
  • They say 'Starve a fever, feed a cold'. I say screw the fever and feed them both.

    They say "Starve a fever, feed a cold". I say screw the fever and feed them both.

    toddb35203/08/2013
    5.00 (2 votes)
  • I've used up all of my sick days, so now I'm calling in dead!

    I've used up all of my sick days, so now I'm calling in dead!

    Tara316389503/05/2013
    5.00 (2 votes)
  • Imagine if Princess Ariel had her own episode of Hoaders. 'Look at this stuff isn't it neat?' No bitch. You have OCD and this is all trash.

    Imagine if Princess Ariel had her own episode of Hoaders. "Look at this stuff isn't it neat?" No bitch. You have OCD and this is all trash.

    Mikey195755108/08/2012
    4.38 (13 votes)
  • Medically speaking: Your extreme morning sickness is in fact Alcohol Withdrawl.

    Medically speaking: Your extreme morning sickness is in fact Alcohol Withdrawl.

    swfierce05/29/2013
    5.00 (2 votes)
  • Get well soon... sick people are such a bore.

    Get well soon... sick people are such a bore.

    stonehouse012106/15/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • That moment when nobody is awake to send me lives for candy crush.

    That moment when nobody is awake to send me lives for candy crush.

    zbarker04/12/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Don't let people shit on you just because their toilet if full!

    Don't let people shit on you just because their toilet if full!

    Jill113229605/12/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Chronic Migraineur life: And then I went crazy. It was the pain I tell you. I just wanted to be a hermit, who never saw light and wore a b.

    Chronic Migraineur life: And then I went crazy. It was the pain I tell you. I just wanted to be a hermit, who never saw light and wore a b.

    myth197704/18/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • isn't it weird that vitamins are supposed to make you live longer when they smell so much like death?

    isn't it weird that vitamins are supposed to make you live longer when they smell so much like death?

    lindsaygelfand01/02/2013
    4.50 (2 votes)
  • Get me a hospital bed for 'efs sake!!

    Get me a hospital bed for 'efs sake!!

    ajaxx05/31/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • In support of Women's Heart Health Month, my heart has decided to stop working properly.

    In support of Women's Heart Health Month, my heart has decided to stop working properly.

    MaydayPictures02/08/2012
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • If you are an ass your whole life to people.. why do you wait until an illness hits you to start being nice??

    If you are an ass your whole life to people.. why do you wait until an illness hits you to start being nice??

    Kelly206924002/24/2013
    5.00 (7 votes)
  • Just relax, this is how my chiropractor does it!

    Just relax, this is how my chiropractor does it!

    Sherrie316281703/16/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • If life gives you lemons, a simple operation can give you melons.

    If life gives you lemons, a simple operation can give you melons.

    TS2519105/25/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Your doctor called with your colonoscopy results. Good news, they found your head!

    Your doctor called with your colonoscopy results. Good news, they found your head!

    Diana281204205/02/2013
    3.00 (2 votes)
  • Maybe you should tell your family that you are not really dead?

    Maybe you should tell your family that you are not really dead?

    mt271563511/14/2012
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Hi, I'm your Doctor. And what stupid fucking thing did you do now?

    Hi, I'm your Doctor. And what stupid fucking thing did you do now?

    Priscilla264502004/28/2013
    3.00 (2 votes)

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