Happy Administrative Professional's Day! Now please clock me for 8 hours of vacation.
I would work way harder if I were someone else working at a different place.
I got my period this morning and thought of you.
I'm glad Christ rose from the dead if for no other reason than Cadbury eggs.
I hope to pay less than $4.00 a gallon for non-renewable energy this Earth Day.
We should give up mid-year performance appraisals for Lent.
We hope you win the 540 million dollar lottery if it means you'll quit working here.
Sorry people immediately relate your new bachelor's degree to your school's horrible sports teams.
I am alarmed at how comfortable we've become with our clothes off.
Let's stuff ourselves with popcorn and treats while watching a movie called "The Hunger Games."
I wonder if other countries have an American Holiday where they get fat and lose their jobs.
I remember when your celebrations lasted longer than your hangovers.
GOP debates are like watching only the interviews in Professional Wrestling.
I still love you even though you shit all over the delivery table.
February should be way longer than all the other months.
I'm giving up trying to find your clitoris for Lent.
I don't need beads to show people my giant boobs.
With any luck, I'll never be President of anything.
