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  • Happy National Left-Handers Day. Here's to showing those scissors in elementary school who's boss.

    Happy National Left-Handers Day. Here's to showing those scissors in elementary school who's boss.

    agirlnamedelise08/13/2012
    5.00 (2 votes)
  • It's Hump Day. How about you come over and help me celebrate.

    It's Hump Day. How about you come over and help me celebrate.

    slynette05007/11/2012
    5.00 (2 votes)
  • I find it odd that wealthy white men celebrate a black man's contributions to society by having others work while they take the day off.

    I find it odd that wealthy white men celebrate a black man's contributions to society by having others work while they take the day off.

    Harvey349515201/20/2014
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Damnit, I missed white history MONTH! When was that again?

    Damnit, I missed white history MONTH! When was that again?

    Kristal300784401/19/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • ...and please let my Starbucks have Pumpkin Spice Lattes early.

    ...and please let my Starbucks have Pumpkin Spice Lattes early.

    Smb102308/29/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Happy Middle Child Day. Now, can we get back to paying attention to the oldest child?

    Happy Middle Child Day. Now, can we get back to paying attention to the oldest child?

    Shauna135440608/12/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Tonight I'm gonna party like it's 1799!

    Tonight I'm gonna party like it's 1799!

    rukgrafx06/25/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • God > everything.

    God > everything.

    egoice103/13/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Here's a thought! For daylight savings time let's spring forward one hour on Monday at about 3:57pm while we're at work. This just makes se.

    Here's a thought! For daylight savings time let's spring forward one hour on Monday at about 3:57pm while we're at work. This just makes se.

    DeAndre206025603/09/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Sorry you have to work on MLK Day because your company's executives are less diverse than Obama's Cabinet.

    Sorry you have to work on MLK Day because your company's executives are less diverse than Obama's Cabinet.

    Sean161773501/21/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Listen up Gangsta, I like Black People, why can't I have Monday off too Homey? Work on Monday? 'Ain't Nobdoy Got Time Fo' Dat!' See...

    Listen up Gangsta, I like Black People, why can't I have Monday off too Homey? Work on Monday? "Ain't Nobdoy Got Time Fo' Dat!" See...

    ASmith111801/21/2013
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Dear Mayan Apocalypse, Reshedule please. Shameless Season 3 starts in January. But feel free to take Justin Bieber and the cast of Jersey Shore.

    Dear Mayan Apocalypse, Reshedule please. Shameless Season 3 starts in January. But feel free to take Justin Bieber and the cast of Jersey Shore.

    nundito12/15/2012
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Let's go and mess up with our lives until next Sunday's repention!

    Let's go and mess up with our lives until next Sunday's repention!

    gruttosingel10/20/2012
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Hostess shut down one month before the Apocalypse, leaving survivors without Twinkies to eat. Well played, Mayans.

    Hostess shut down one month before the Apocalypse, leaving survivors without Twinkies to eat. Well played, Mayans.

    Dave9128211/16/2012
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Everyone is all like 'Boo Hoo I Love Romney' or 'Bla Bla Bla I Love Obama' but I'm over here all 'I Love You' and Han Solo is like 'I Know'.

    Everyone is all like "Boo Hoo I Love Romney" or "Bla Bla Bla I Love Obama" but I'm over here all "I Love You" and Han Solo is like "I Know".

    Heathyre274408011/07/2012
    5.00 (2 votes)
  • Anyone who talks like a pirate to me today is going to get a peg leg up the ass.

    Anyone who talks like a pirate to me today is going to get a peg leg up the ass.

    tbone113809/19/2012
    5.00 (2 votes)
  • Today is National Chocolate Milkshake Day AND National Video Game Day. If anyone tells my kids, I will tell you'rs tomorrow is free puppy day!

    Today is National Chocolate Milkshake Day AND National Video Game Day. If anyone tells my kids, I will tell you'rs tomorrow is free puppy day!

    Mike240601609/12/2012
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • I can't wait to NOT spend ANY of the holidays with your deranged family this year.

    I can't wait to NOT spend ANY of the holidays with your deranged family this year.

    Christy149007609/06/2012
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • I feel the Presidential Election should be like a multiple choice test... C) None of the above.

    I feel the Presidential Election should be like a multiple choice test... C) None of the above.

    Gary230603808/23/2012
    3.67 (3 votes)
  • May your Pioneer Day celebrations not include a religious slaughter the likes of the Mountian Meadows Massacre!

    May your Pioneer Day celebrations not include a religious slaughter the likes of the Mountian Meadows Massacre!

    parentalguidance07/23/2012
    5.00 (2 votes)

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