

I'm sorry I thought your someecards avatar was a photograph from your childhood.
I feel I should apologize for what I did in your bathroom yesterday.
Sorry I repeatedly grabbed your ass the last time we cooked together.
Let's celebrate St. Patrick's Day by calling out of work and having sex until we can't stand up!!!
I'll bitch slap you if you keep telling people that we willingly saw "The Happening"...
That bullshit you heard about "Paul Blart" on my Netflix queue is nothing but a dirty fucking lie.
Good luck finding a chick who won't ever question you. Did you not see my red hair?