Have you had your three servings of vagina today??
May your porn collection survive Hurricane Earl.
I am shocked it took this long for someone to go postal over Kate plus 8
Your new facebook profile picture made me reevaluate our relationship.
Sorry, I thought this was what you meant when you said you wanted to put your balls on my head.
My door is always open if you ever want to talk about how you can get the fuck out of my office.
I'd stop cutting myself for you.
Sorry for my sexual innuendos during sex...
You really don't know how close you were to being axed to death.
I'd brave a category 4 hurricane if it meant leaving work early.
Moneys tight, times are hard, I hope you like my free birthday ecard!
Your excessive use of hand sanitizer does nothing for the stench wafting from your ass
We've decided your incredible rack would be an asset to our company
The lack of blow jobs in this relationship is alarming
It offends my rural northeastern upbringing to see how insane today's suburban kids are.
I'm sorry that my breath smelled of stale coffee and balls
