Somewhat Topical User Cardsshowing 1 - 20 of 10,000+
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  • They say, 'You are what you eat!' That's funny. I don't remember eating a sexy beast this morning.

    They say, "You are what you eat!" That's funny. I don't remember eating a sexy beast this morning.

    Elizabeth7447901/24/2012
    5 sends
    4.81 (16 votes)
  • Sorry to hear that your Facebook stock is now as worthless as your Facebook posts.

    Sorry to hear that your Facebook stock is now as worthless as your Facebook posts.

    Bottomofthebarrelyesterday
    5 sends
    4.67 (6 votes)
  • Let's plant some wood for Arbor Day.

    Let's plant some wood for Arbor Day.

    jenhanna04/27/2012
    4 sends
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • 'I'd like a Diet Coke please.' 'Is Diet Pepsi okay?' 'Is Monoply money okay?'

    "I'd like a Diet Coke please." "Is Diet Pepsi okay?" "Is Monoply money okay?"

    mnewlander03/19/2012
    2 sends
    4.44 (9 votes)
  • Mr. Grey prefers brunettes who like to eat. Take that skinny bitches.

    Mr. Grey prefers brunettes who like to eat. Take that skinny bitches.

    sandypvz04/23/2012
    2 sends
    4.33 (3 votes)
  • A Haiku about getting out of bed: No no no no no, No no no no no no no, No no no no no.

    A Haiku about getting out of bed: No no no no no, No no no no no no no, No no no no no.

    ashleyrocks91004/28/2012
    2 sends
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • After reading Fifty Shades of Grey I can't help but think everyone around me is using anal beads.

    After reading Fifty Shades of Grey I can't help but think everyone around me is using anal beads.

    katiesilva05/01/2012
    2 sends
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Ummm...Honey, Instead of saying good-bye, will you say, 'Laters, Baby' to me?

    Ummm...Honey, Instead of saying good-bye, will you say, "Laters, Baby" to me?

    Stephanie152109405/09/2012
    2 sends
    0.00 (0 votes)
  • Does my beard look like balls?

    Does my beard look like balls?

    payTNT9805/17/2012
    2 sends
    0.00 (0 votes)
  • Thank you for cutting off funding to cancer screening programs in order to prove that you are pro-life.

    Thank you for cutting off funding to cancer screening programs in order to prove that you are pro-life.

    Carmen552702/01/2012
    2 sends
    4.19 (67 votes)
  • It's a bad economy when even I can't sleep my way into employment.

    It's a bad economy when even I can't sleep my way into employment.

    The Hulk11/15/2011
    1 sends
    4.00 (12 votes)
  • I knew you were hacked when the porn you sent me wasn't totally disgusting.

    I knew you were hacked when the porn you sent me wasn't totally disgusting.

    japanesecowboy11/15/2011
    1 sends
    4.36 (11 votes)
  • If I had to be any Kardashian sister, I would choose Bruce Jenner.

    If I had to be any Kardashian sister, I would choose Bruce Jenner.

    Mandi975611/29/2011
    1 sends
    4.42 (19 votes)
  • Sometimes I grab my boobs. Because, well, I can.

    Sometimes I grab my boobs. Because, well, I can.

    Liliya01/02/2012
    1 sends
    0.00 (0 votes)
  • Let me know when you're off your man-period.

    Let me know when you're off your man-period.

    Karen2224401/06/2012
    1 sends
    0.00 (0 votes)
  • At least my job description doesn't involve repairing the economy or being the new head football coach at Penn State.

    At least my job description doesn't involve repairing the economy or being the new head football coach at Penn State.

    randallshelley01/07/2012
    1 sends
    4.38 (8 votes)
  • I can't imagine having a white President again.

    I can't imagine having a white President again.

    David9809957201/11/2012
    1 sends
    4.18 (11 votes)
  • Not caring about the Republican nominee is getting to be really exhausting.

    Not caring about the Republican nominee is getting to be really exhausting.

    jennaphoto01/12/2012
    1 sends
    4.60 (5 votes)
  • I paid attention to the construction signs and got in the correct lane. You ignored them for miles and now you want me to let you in. Not going to happen.

    I paid attention to the construction signs and got in the correct lane. You ignored them for miles and now you want me to let you in. Not going to happen.

    LAGEOSE01/27/2012
    1 sends
    4.00 (3 votes)
  • Let's Zumba, bitch.

    Let's Zumba, bitch.

    spudow02/12/2012
    1 sends
    0.00 (0 votes)

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