Let's get totally out of control this weekend.
"Cheers to the 3 day freakin' weekend, Yes I'll drink to that".
I should warn you before we go out: I put on 5 lbs of muscle with every beer I drink.
You have a luxury car and that makes you attractive!
I would like 5 cartons of cigarettes and $2 on pump number 5 please.
My plans for the weekend include you, me and Skype.
Cheers! Happy Hump Day:) ...2 More Days Til' I get S**t Faced This Labor Day Weekend;).
Let's drink like there's a tomorrow.
The prospect of a long holiday weekend makes me feel infinitely less bitchy.
My attempt at achieving Liver Failure status failed miserably this weekend.
I'm so glad my drunk self bought my hungover self Gatorade and Beef Jerky!
Go to sleep so I can leave you with Grandma to get drunk with my friends.
This is how pictures were viewed before Facebook. I don't want to live on this planet anymore.
Hurry up and take the pic hunny. Mommy needs to post this on Facebook.
It is certainly tough being this Awesome, but I do it so the kids have somebody to look up to.
Ah finally! Beer:30! Cheers bitches!!
I can't wait to act like sluts in an environment where no one knows what sluts we really aren't!
Sorry the Chicago Police Department whipped your hippie ass.
Next time, make sure your weekends are facebook status worthy.
![[UPDATED] 23 Craigslist Missed Connections that we pray never lead to a connection.](http://cdn.someecards.com/someecards/images/feed_assets/4e07b1762a1ac_m4e08b71540124.png)
