The sad part about your default picture is it's your best one.
I put cunt in my GPS and it took me to your house.
I wonder if the double rainbow guy jerks off to Skittles.
I'm sorry you were able to use my wedding band as a cock ring.
The sad part about your default picture is you probably took it ten times and that was the best one.
You really got the shit end of the last name stick.
I go through far too much Kleenex for someone who's never sick.
Just a friendly reminder your too old to be wearing Abercrombie.
I still don't see the big deal about this Justin Beaver kid.
Just a reminder the Justin Beiber cd comes out today. Also coming out, any guy that buys it.
If I wanted to have sex with strings attached I would bang a marionette.
If women really mean "it's the little things in life that matter", then I have just the thing.
Happy Pi Day to someone who don't know what the fuck Pi is.
I'm sorry your mail-order bride returned the Green Card and swam back to Kazakhstan.
You are my rock, and by rock I mean the one tied to my leg pulling me to the bottom of the ocean.
My sex life is based on alcohol and poor decisions.
