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Valentine's Day 2/14 / Last Updated Monday, February 9th, 2009 / Displaying 1- 20 of 60

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Thinking of Facebook-stalking you this Valentine's Day

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I wanted to wish you a Happy Valentine's Day but I used up all my love on Obama

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Valentine's Day falling on a Saturday may make it trickier to use working late as a cover for not having plans

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Try not to savagely assault happy couples this Valentine's Day

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This Valentine's Day, I'm going to fantasize I had a very romantic dinner before masturbating myself to sleep

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I hate Valentine's Day unless you'd like to be my date

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Be aware that whether you give me Valentine's Day candy or not I will fear the worst regarding your thoughts on my weight

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Happy Valentine's Day to someone who raised me, loved me unconditionally, and made me almost capable of having a functional relationship

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I'm so grateful Valentine's Day is on a Saturday so I don't have to watch everyone's flowers being delivered at work

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It's not what you do for me on Valentine's Day that matters but the amount of jealousy it provokes in others

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I managed to secure Valentine's Day dinner reservations at both 4:45 p.m. and 11:30 p.m.

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Let's schedule enough dates between now and February 13 so that it won't be awkward to go out on Valentine's Day

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Let's have a fiscally but not sexually conservative Valentine's Day

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Happy early Valentine's Day to someone who should already be planning the greatest night of my life

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Please give me an estimate of the cheapest Valentine's Day date that will still result in us having sex

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Join me for a girls' night this Valentine's Day to celebrate our independence before we drunk text our exes and quietly sob ourselves to sleep

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I feel an Obama-induced pressure to be extra smooth this Valentine's Day

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You make my heart beat entirely too fast

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Big dinners make me drowsy so let's do the sex part first

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As fuck buddies, we should fuck this Valentine's Day

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