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Are you feeling SAD? Are you MISSING SOMETHING IN YOUR DEPRESSING LIFE, but you don't know what? Maybe you think that the thing you are missing is "A GOOD SANDWICH" or "A STRONG FATHER FIGURE" or "NOT TRUE LOVE NECESSARILY, BUT A PARTNER I CAN WEATHER THE SEAS OF LIFE WITH." But I know the TRUTH about what is MISSING FROM YOUR LIFE. It is CRAB BABIES. Thousands of CRAB BABIES. Luckily for YOU, I can HELP:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=21&v=zFdoedMG5yU
Sources: h/t Digg