Are you an emusexual? That's when you watch a video of an emu having sex with a backpack and feel very confused about what even counts as sex in these modern times. Photographer Arnhem Peterson was snippity-snapping away at some sort of random animal collection preserve, when he left his camera bag briefly unattended. They warn you not to do this in airports for this very reason! If you leave your bag alone, an emu will try to f*ck it.

Sources: YouTube: Arnycain