These are actual poems written by Someecards contributors when they were angsty teenagers instead of angsty adults.
Happy Bad Poetry Day! We hope you're celebrating by reading the worst poetry you can find, unlike every other day of the year, when you spend hour after hour reading the world's best poets. We decided to commemorate the occasion by asking our contributors, who are all accomplished and talented comedy writers, to dust off their old three-ring binders and send us the most embarrassing poetry they wrote back when they were teenagers. And a few of them actually did it! They're just that desperate for attention. We hope you enjoy it, because they definitely won't.
Brian Boone – "Untitled"
Really a lot
through a field,
Then lie there for
And just stop
and think about life
Author's note: "It's not nearly as bad as my early attempts at humor writing."
Follow Brian on Twitter: @brianadamsboone
Ziwe Fumudoh – "Lone Wolf" (excerpt)
I am the wolf.
I walk alone.
No one to guide me.
No place to call home.
Author's note: "I was a moody 13 year old, primarily because I had just hit puberty, but didn't fully grasp the concept of deodorant." This poem won third place in a competition (out of 12 applicants).
Follow Ziwe on Twitter: @ziweeee
Mike Primavera – "Untitled"
Your promises are made of glass,
They break upon the lips they pass,
The pieces fall onto the ground,
Making a familiar sound.
Matt Nedostup – "Destiny"
Author's note: That's the whole thing.
Follow me on Twitter and never mention this: @nedostup
Ashley Bez – "N.O."
I never felt alone until I met you
you only give me what you want
but you know I want more
why do you let me think we have something
when it's really nothing at all
and I try to drop a hint
but it's really nothing at all
so i think that i will just be blunt
I should have spoken up from the start
because I deserve better than this
I don't deserve to be at another person's
because that's what I am
and here I am
feeling more alone than before we met
Author's note: "I was in 10th grade. Some moron was stringing me along and I kept falling for his garbage. I had enough and told him it was over, so I scratched "IT IS ALL OVER" in red pen atop the poem. But then, he wanted to try again, so I wrote "so it continues" at the bottom. For the record, I'm now 31 and have learned nothing."
Follow Bez on Twitter because she's very brave: @bez