During her show Sunday in Tampa, FL, comedian Amy Schumer called Donald Trump an "orange, sexual-assaulting, fake-college-starting monster," upsetting a number of Trump-supporting audience members so much that they walked out of the show. So at the start of her show at New York City's Madison Garden on Tuesday night, she read an open letter to the audience, apologizing for daring to think she could discuss not only current events but also her opinions during her own headlining show.
The full text of the letter read:
I’m sorry you didn’t want me, a comedian who talks about what she believes in, to mention the biggest thing going on in our country right now. How could I think it was OK to spend five minutes having a peaceful conversation with someone with different views?
After the show, I want you to know that I will go straight to a rehab facility that will teach me how to make all people happy. Both the rich, entitled, white people who are gonna vote for him and the very poor people—who’ve been tricked into it!
And Tampa, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have said that he was an orange, sexual-assaulting, fake-college-starting monster. Shouldn’t have said that. I will never again say that he is an orange, sexual-assaulting, fake-college-starting monster! Never again!
When she finished the letter, she added,
Honestly, I'm so grateful you're all here, and I was grateful for everyone in that audience that night, even the people that left. And I look forward to putting this all behind us in a couple weeks, when Hillary Clinton is our motherfucking president! Thank you to the good people here and in Tampa.
The audience was also treated to a surprise guest at the show—Madonna! The comedian opened for the pop star last year, so it seemed fitting that this time, it should be the other way around. And this will probably by the only time Madonna ever opens for someone else ever again.