Calvin Harris, former slam piece of Taylor Swift, forgot to slam a door closed on his Range Rover while fleeing the paparazzi on Monday. He had a valet pull his car around to the back of his gym in Los Angeles, because that's how the other half lives. Here's the very, very slow escape, shot from multiple angles:

The result of his getaway is exactly what one would expect when an open door meets an immovable object (wall). This slow, embarrassing public car wreck is a bit of metaphor for his recent breakup with Swift. If Harris parts ways with that Range Rover, it too may soon get to hook up with Tom Hiddleston.

Sources: Jezebel | YouTube: X17onlineVideo