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People who think rap is easy are the same people who can only write the most absolutely terrible raps. Whether the celebrities on this list were earnestly trying their hand at hip-hop or just making a quick cash grab, each one of them definitely regretted it afterwards. Either way, this collection includes a lifetime's worth of cringe in just 14 songs. Before you start, have some Wu-Tang ready to play as a palate cleanser afterwards.

1. Rodney Dangerfield – "Rappin' Rodney"

Dangerfield's debut rap single peaked at 83 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart, and came with a B-side called "Rodney Continues Rappin'."

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2. Joe Pesci – "Wise Guy"

Before Pesci was an actor, he was a lounge singer. When he retired from acting in 1999, he tried music again, and his muse inspired him to create this mob-themed rap single.


3. Tom Hanks and Dan Aykroyd – "City of Crime"

Recorded for the 1987 film reboot of Dragnet, Tom and Dan's rap features choreography by Paula Abdul and the line “In case you don’t agree/with my methodology/I like to do things my way.”

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4. Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino – "The Situation"

This eponymous track will make you want to pump your fist into your speakers.


5. Rosie O'Donnell – "Untitled Rap About Chairs"

It makes some weird kind of sense that Rosie O'Donnell's music would be inspired by chairs. This was her first and only furniture-related song.

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6. Oprah ft. Jay-Z – "Untitled Attempt At Freestyling On Live TV"

Oprah certainly has the money to back up braggadocio raps about wealth. She's just lacking the rhythm.


7. Karl "MC Rove" ft. The Cast Of 'Whose Line Is It Anyway?' – "Untitled White House Correspondent's Dinner Embarrassment"

The former Chief of Staff may have been the go-to consultant for getting Republicans into office, but he will be their last resort for entering the music industry.

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8. Mr. T – "Treat Your Mother Right"

Mr. T's rap debut may have been worthy of his own pity, but the A-Team alum's message about respecting moms showed that his big gold heart was in the right place.


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9. Ron Jeremy – "Freak Of The Week"

The least appealing person in the porn industry made a song that somehow reached 95 on the Billboard Hot 100. You're probably best off forgetting 1995 all together.


10. David "D' Lil" Faustino – "I Told Ya"

The Married...With Children star released a song so goofy, you'd think Bud Bundy wrote it himself.

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11. The 1985 Chicago Bears – "The Super Bowl Shuffle"

Nothing makes a 6' 4", 260 pounds-of-muscle linebacker seem less intimidating than an embarrassingly bad rap about scoring touchdowns. This landed at 41 on the Billboard Hot 100, which is a ranking system you've probably lost all respect for at this point in the list.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZnR-WaPyX8

12. Kevin Federline – "Lose Control"

In this clip, Dane Cook and Jessica Simpson introduce a pregnant Britney Spears, who introduces her husband Kevin Federline's debut performance as the closing act of a reggae-themed Teen Choice Awards. Watch this video and travel back to a bad, bad time in American culture.

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13. Hulk Hogan and The Wrestling Boot Band – "Beach Patrol"

"Saw a girl in trouble, a sticky situation/She wanted me to give her mouth-to-mouth resuscitation." The way he delivers this lyric would be enough to make a judge force Hogan to return that $140 million.

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14. Shia Labeouf – "Untitled Freestyle From When Shia Was Innocent"

This wouldn't be the last time Shia tried rapping, but it was the only time he did it before everything he did could be written off as performance art.

Wow, you made it all the way through this article of very bad music. It's time to cleanse that palate with Ol' Dirty Bastard. You've earned it.