Lindsay Lohan's 30th birthday is coming up, and according to Page Six, she can't find any brands that are willing to sponsor her party. Really? No takers at all? We have a feeling she might be going about this the wrong way. Lindsay, listen. It's all about asking the right people. You might not know it, but your movies have (probably) done wonders for a lot of different brands that we're sure would love to help you out. Here are some suggestions.
Your characters in The Parent Trap were the epitome of cool late '90s pre-teens. We all wanted to be just like you. When we found out that Hallie Parker and Annie James ate their Oreos with peanut butter, we all made our moms rush out to the store to buy Oreos so we could try it for ourselves. There's no way there wasn't a spike in sales after that film was released. Nothing sells a cookie like an adorable 12 year-old with a jaded outlook on love.
Oreos would definitely sponsor your party. They owe you!
Pillsbury Toaster Strudel
Come on, Lindsay. Mean Girls put Toaster Strudel on the map! This is one of the most quoted lines in the history of teen movies:
Sure, maybe it wasn't your character that had the direct connection to the product, but you were the star of the movie! You've definitely got some pull in the frozen breakfast pastry sphere. All you need to do is ask. Maybe they'll even make you a Toaster Strudel cake!
Your character in Freaky Friday was a fashion icon for suburban kids who wanted to be punky and rebellious. You looked like Avril Lavigne! That was so cool in 2003. We're sure more than a few 14 year-olds had their mom drop them off at the mall so they could go to Hot Topic and score one of those sweet choker necklaces.
They'd probably decorate your party entirely with Nightmare Before Christmas merchandise! You'd like that, wouldn't you? Go on. Ask them.
So there you go, Lindsay. Let us know how it works out. If worse comes to worse, use some of that child star money to make your own brand and sponsor yourself! Maybe a skincare brand or a line of novelty lip glosses? Either way, keep your head up. Your party is going to be great. Happy birthday!