"I'm gonna make you scream and shout with the part of my body where poop comes out."
Like her character in Trainwreck (Spoiler alert): Amy Schumer got to dance with the pros at Madison Square Garden. Last night, Amy opened for Madonna's tour with a standup set, and Madonna then "welcomed her to the stage," Swift-style. Amy showed off her impeccable twerking skills, and we got to see plenty of buns, hun.
Madonna crowned Amy the night's Unapologetic Bitch, before beginning a weird sock-puppet bit (which has been baffling people online for months) that shows while comedians can be great dancers, not all great dancers can be comedians.
Like a prayer, Madonna officially invited Amy into her squad. Suck it, Swift.