And then a hero comes along, and gives you the opportunity to appear in an awful ad. And you finally see the truth: Your back catalog of songs means $$$ for you.
For years, Mariah Carey has been one of those weird celebrities who seems somehow ageless. Up until recently, you could have told me that she's only five years older now than she was in 1990, and part of me would be like, "Yeah, that totally makes sense." But now, Carey has committed that big celebrity-aging no-no: appearing in a terrible commercial for a smartphone game with one of her old songs. And oh man, it is terrible. It looks like it was edited by an intern, and I feel like they either did one take of everything, or else the stuff on the cutting room floor is just bizarre. ("No, Mariah — don't strut away from the guys. No, don't purr like a kitten. No, Mariah, we don't need you to sing 'Fantasy' now. Just run.")
Carey replaces Sienna Miller as the Game of War spokesperson, who I can only assume is moving on to commercial work for a reboot of Snood.