In an interview with Michelle Rodriguez from an upcoming documentary by Michael Zapolin called The Reality of Truth, Rodriguez talks about losing her friend and co-star Paul Walker, and the effects it had on her.
She admits that after the death of Walker, she got caught up in thinking about the transience of life and it drove her to act in ways she wouldn't normally act. She also says that while tripping on psychedelic plant/drug called ayahuasca, she felt sadness that she'd been left behind. "Made me sad that he left me here. It wasn't a sadness that he's gone, it's more like a jealousy that he's there first," she explains.
If this seems super intense and weird, that's probably because A) it kind of is, and B) she was tripping balls and maybe still is a little in the interview? But also because C) apparently she felt that she and Paul had a special connection, and that he was the "deepest guy [she] knew." In an interview with Entertainment Weekly in 2015, Rodriguez said:
I could see Paul once every two years and just know there was another human on the planet who's deep like me, who loves like that. When that disappears, you wonder, 'Wait a minute, what do I hold on to?' There was nothing to tether me to this existence: 'Why am I f**king here? And, like, why'd you leave without me?'"
So that's not such a strange thing to feel, really. Just a sad person grieving for her friend, who died quickly and tragically. And also, drugs.