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Despite helping to decrease the unemployment rate himself, President Obama is about to be out of work. Luckily Stephen Colbert, or "Randy the office manager," is there to help him spruce up his résumé in preparation for the job hunt. Looks like that 3rd term really isn't happening. Damn.

With his qualifications, President Obama could pretty much take his pick of any career he would like. Basically anything would be less stressful than his previous job, but doesn't have the perk of getting to ride around in Air Force One.

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Hopefully "Randy" doesn't give President Obama fashion tips—with that blue vest the only job he would land is "Walmart greeter."