It's too f*cking hot to leave your air conditioned living room this week. Here's how you should be passing your time instead:
1. Stranger Things, Netflix
It's the show that everyone on your Facebook feed is talking about, so jump on this thing before the conversation leaves you! I haven't watched it yet (I know, I need to)m but from what I understand it's set in the 1980s, it involves a Stephen-King-meets-Stephen Spielberg plot, and it revitalizes the career of beloved American icon Winona Ryder. Besides, are you going to watch a cheesy horror television show in the winter? Disposable television is what summer is for.
2. Tropic Thunder, HBOGo
Of all the "hard R" comedies that littered cineplexes in the mid-2000s, this might be the funniest. Featuring great performances by Ben Stiller, Jack Black, and especially Robert Downey Jr., it is particularly memorable for going right up to the edge of being offensive while always, somehow, getting away with it. It's leaving HBO in August, so if you haven't seen it yet, get on that.
3. Bojack Horseman (Season 3), Netflix
The just-added third season of the acclaimed Netflix animated comedy apparently features a near-wordless episode set entirely underwater, among other marvels you usually can't find in animated comedies with talking animals.
4. Spring Breakers, Hulu
Sure, it says "Spring" in the title, but what could be more summery than watching a bunch of Disney channel stars make James Franco perform fellatio on a gun? This movie, just added to Hulu this month, is completely bonkers and silly, but director Harmony Korine's crass and commercial take on the American road trip story is fun.
5. Hannibal (Season 3), Amazon
Hannibal could quite comfortably be called one of the best shows of all time—yes, as good as that canonical quadrumvirate of Mad Men, Breaking Bad, The Wire, and The Sopranos—but low ratings led to its cancelation after just three seasons. It's a shame, because it really isn't like anything else on television—creator Bryan Fuller somehow took the strangely homophobic series of books featuring cannibal serial killer Hannibal Lector and turned the story into a mesmerizing, psychedelic gay romance. And no, that description isn't remotely an exaggeration, and and yes, I did have to look up the word "quadrumvirate."