John Oliver tries, and mostly fails, to explain English soccer to David Letterman.

John Oliver tries, and mostly fails, to explain English soccer to David Letterman.
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John Oliver tries, and mostly fails, to explain English soccer to David Letterman.

"We managed to get the class system into sports."

I don't know why everyone is always pretending like the English football system is so complicated. It's really not. All you really need to know is that there's four main leagues in which teams play. In order of prestige, they are: the Barclays Premier League, the Football League Championship, the House of Lords, and BBC 1. 

If you do well enough in one league, you can move up to the next, provided you receive a royal dispensation from the Queen. To receive such a dispensation, the yeoman of said team must petition the Lord Protector of each of the Seven Kingdoms. These are England, Scotland, Westeros, Mordor, the House of Commons, BBC 2, and the Earl of Sandwich. Before petitioning, the team yeoman must don his finest kilt and—

You know what, maybe we should just let John Oliver explain it. It always sounds better in an English accent:

(by Dennis DiClaudio)

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