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Settle in, friends, because there is an absolute batshit delight of a video waiting for you below. In a mere 1 minute 43 seconds, this fight between local news anchors on manages to include LeBron James, Space Jam, motherly love, sarcasm, an epic eye roll, friendship, betrayal, honor, the Amy Schumer film Trainwreck, a handwritten note, overnight stays at mom's house, and a man referring to his news station, KRON, like it's a goddamn alien overlord that has attached itself to the back of his neck and is controlling his thoughts. Actually, maybe that's what KRON really is, because that's one of the few things that would explain this spectacular display of petty behavior: