When this woman is angry at her mother's friend, she asks Reddit:
I (16F) was on holiday last week with my mother (48F) her best friend Rita (46F) and Her husband Mark (50M) and son Jake (15M)
Rita and my mother have been best friends since their teenage years. Rita had been quite overweight since her and mom were teenagers but recently lost weight last year.
I can tell this REALLY upsets my mom but that’s not relevant to the story. This sudden weight loss has been due to Rita’s diet.
She only eats between 12pm-5pm and won’t have any sugar at all. She drinks copious amounts of water and coffee. In my opinion, this is not healthy but its Rita’s choice.
Over the week we were away, Rita constantly commented on everything I ate and drank and made snide comments about my body. She seemed to take real issue with how much I ate.
It came to a head on the last night of the holiday. I had a big steak and tonic water. When I ordered the tonic water, the waiter asked what type I wanted and Rita chimed in saying I better get slimline and watch myself. Her husband looked shocked but I didn’t say anything.
Later on she commented on how much of the steak I had eaten and told me I should skip desert. When Jake insisted we share a sundae I said yes. This really set Rita off, she told me to stop being such a greedy pig and to stop eating because I’m so chubby already. (I’m slimmer than her)
When I told her to shut up and get a grip, she tore into me calling me names and insulting my looks. I told her to shut up and I’d isn’t need to follow her stupid diet to look good.
Here’s where i could be a huge AH- I told her I still looked better than her. And my current diet (none) works better than hers ever could. I know this was absolutely horrible of me because many people including myself are incredibly insecure about their weight.
Rita got incredibly angry and called a vicious cow and a few other words I don’t care to repeat. I told her to Grow up and then her husband dragged her away.
Rita is very angry at me still and so is my mother. Jake finds this funny and doesn’t really like his mom anyway. My dad is absolutely disgusted by Rita and my mom for not defending me. I’m not sure if I am or not though. AITA??
peonychalk writes:
NTA. You were rude, but it sounds like you know it. Unfortunately, several extra decades of life have not given Rita the self-awareness that you possess at 16. Consider it your punishment to reflect on how you could have taken her down a peg (which she greatly deserved) without being quiteso rude.
There were plenty of things you could have said to her without commenting on her body, since after all, you don't appreciate the comments she makes about your body.
That said, why is a grown-ass woman coming after a teenager like this? This is one way eating disorders are born.
It sucks that she has such a difficult relationship with her own body, but we need to raise the next generation to not have those issues. I'm proud of you for standing up for yourself, even if you were rude about it.
Also, for the record, your mom is wrong: it's not normal for people to 'call out what they see.'
Usually mothers teach their children not to comment on someone else's appearance unless it's something they can fix in 10 seconds. Broccoli in their teeth? Tell them! 'You're getting a little chubby'? Keep that to yourself.
annualcontact115 writes:
NTA. Rita needs to stop with the food policing and body shaming. And your mother is straight TA for siding with her bully of a body.
I can’t even be made at you for the whole “i look better than you” cause she started it. If she can’t take it she shouldn’t diss it. And she shouldn’t be dissing given she’s an adult.
Time to start your out plan. College too far away to leave at home, take everything, stay for summer terms etc. LC until you don’t need Mommy for tuition etc and then NC if she hasn’t straighten up her act.