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Teenage girl is furious with dad and stepmom when they violate her privacy.

Teenage girl is furious with dad and stepmom when they violate her privacy.


When this girl is upset with her dad and stepmom, she asks Reddit:

'AITA for not sharing what I wrote in my family therapy journal with my dad and stepmom?'

Started family therapy with my dad and stepmom almost a year ago. The therapist is great. She does individual with me once a week and we see her as a group once a week as well.

Session one she gave us a diary each to write in every week and for us to discuss with her/the group if we want after. I never share what I write with them. I do share with the therapist. We talk about it a lot.

A couple of weeks back I had filled the original diary she gave me so she found another one for me. My dad and stepmom wanted to hear what I wrote but I said I didn't want to share it with them.

For context: I lost my mom when I was 8. Parents were divorced. Dad was dating her at the time but I met her like 5 weeks after I lost my mom. Dad moved the relationship along really fast so I would have another mom.

I told him I wouldn't accept another mom. He told me I would see, that it would be so easy. A little over a year later they had a baby together and then another and another and another.

From the time the first baby was born they have mentioned adopting me, when I wouldn't go along with that and they were told it was a no go without my being on board by some lawyers...

they had her become my legal guardian and set it up so she would get me if dad died, and they have enforced that I must spend at least 6 hours of my week doing some bonding time with her, as a way to push past the distance I keep from her as a mother figure.

So in my diary I have wrote how I wish my mom was there for stuff instead of her.

How sometimes I close my eyes when something special is happening in my life and in my head I swap my stepmom out for my mom, and I imagine the conversation mom and I would have had or what she would say to me in the moment.

I write about that a lot.

And how growing up without a mom sucks. How not having a mom as a teenager is rough as hell. Then we discuss it. The therapist was mostly concerned with the upset I feel when I swap them out in my head and then have to face reality, so we're working on that.

Anyway, my dad and stepmom, saying they were 'concerned they were left in the dark about something important' rooted through my stuff, found the therapy diary and read the whole thing. Then they got so mad.

They asked how I could be so cruel. How I could dismiss her so easily. To say I grew up without a mom when my stepmom is right there, doing all the mother things. Then it became how that was important to share with them in therapy so we could fix it.

They ended up lashing out at the therapist and they are now refusing to use her services again. They are looking for someone new. While I am public enemy number one. AITA?

Let's find out.

exaltednoob writes:

NTA, but i think your therapist could confirm that way better than strangers on aita. Seems like they are not actually taking the therapy seriously, just seeking peace of mind for their bad behaviour.

objectivezero102 writes:

Sure, because they invaded your privacy and got called out for it. Small consolation for you that you are NTA and they are utterly and completely wrong.

Bad enough that they are forcing you to spend 6 hours a week with stepmom to create an artificial bond.

Have they shared their diaries with you? I would guess no. They have absolutely no concept of healthy boundaries based on your post.

This would have me planning my escape as soon as I legally could: do you have grandparents or other relatives on your mom's side that you can turn to?

icupnurp writes:

NTA. I'm sorry your dad went and ruined not only your trust but also therapy that seemed to be working for you. Let every new therapist know what he did, preferably when you are alone. There are also options going forward.

You don't mention how old you are, but one of the safest is to fake it til you make it and turn 18. Silently obtain everything you need while pretending to give your dad what he wants, then move out when you are 18 and can be free of him.

Get your birth certificate, social security card, and other important documents. Move any money to a bank account with only your name, preferably at a new bank.

Looks like OP is NTA. Any advice for her when it comes to dealing with her family?

Sources: Reddit
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