When this husband is concerned for his wife's health, he asks Reddit:
My (30M) wife (29F) has a case of type 2 diabetes that runs in her genes. Even though my wife knows that she has diabetes she doesn’t seem to care at all that she has diabetes. She has been on a strict medication that her doctor has set her which has been some foods and she’s not allowed to eat fried/sugary stuff as this will raise her sugar levels.
Yesterday i went to the the shop and she came with me and i bought what we needed to get and she just followed along with me. As we are at the till she says that she needs to go to the toilet and will meet me outside. When i’m done with paying i go outside only to see my wife opening a packet of haribos which the doctor says she’s not allowed to eat.
I quickly run over before she open it and i grab it out of her hand and throw it in the bin. She starts getting angry saying that i’m a bitch and a overprotective MF and she starts crying almost saying how it’s not fair how she’s not allowed to eat sweets. I tell her to stop and say that i cannot let her eat that.
She grabs my keys for my car and she drives away leaving me at the shop. I call her over and over and she doesn’t pick up. I’m absolutely furious at her and start walking home. As soon as i’m home i see her eating fried food on the sofa and i grab the food out of her hand saying that you cannot eat that.
I also yell at her saying that she’s selfish leaving me at the shop like that. She doesn’t care and picks up the food and shoves it at my face and calls me a prick and leaves the house. I don’t know where she is and not sure if i’m the asshole. I love her a lot and i cant let her eat those types of foods as it’s bad for her. AITA?
YTA. You can't treat your wife like a toddler. Grabbing things out of her hands, throwing things away, telling her what she's allowed to consume... that's not how you treat a spouse. Her attitude and reaction leaves tons to ve desired, but she's your wife. She's not your child. You shouldn't be 'forbidding' her to eat anything.
ESH. She's handling her diabetes like a child, and I'm sure it's very frightening and frustrating to you to watch her make choices which will do her harm and might well kill her if it goes too far.
All that said, it doesn't matter what your reasons are, -- you absolutely CANNOT physically force another adult human being to do what you choose instead of what they choose. Not ever. Not even if their choice is going to kill them and your choice is going to keep them alive.
What you've been doing borders on criminal assault, if it hasn't crossed the line already. You have to stop this, immediately and completely. You can try everything in your persuasive arsenal to convince your wife to eat in a healthy way. But you cannot force her to eat in a healthy way. And you need to banish from your mind the concept of 'letting' or 'not letting' her do anything. It's not your right -- period.
What on earth is wrong with you that you think it's okay to physically remove food from your partner's hands and berate them as you do? I'll wait. Your partner is responsible for their health, warden. Were I in her place, I'd've been packing your shit into suitcases while you walked home. YTA, so many times. And more for thinking you're justified in your absolutely shite behaviour.