Pregnant woman refuses to acknowledge SIL's 'Wiccan fertility spell,' SIL gets revenge.
When this woman is weirded out by her SIL, she asks Reddit:
'AITA for refusing to thank my Wicca SIL for her “fertility spell” after I successfully got pregnant?'
So I recently found out I’m pregnant after a little less than a year of trying for a baby. Our family knew in recent months that we were trying but having a little difficulty waiting, although doctors assured us it was still a matter of time and nothing out of normal range.
Anyways a month ago my SIL announced to our big family group chat that she was going to cast a “master-level fertility spell” for us to help with our conception.
It was super weird to me because no one asked her to do this, but she’s a self-proclaimed lifetime Wiccan and apparently she carries quite a bit of clout in her local witch community.
She said the spell she was doing for us would cost a lot of money if she was charging like normal. At the time I just said something like “haha thanks for thinking of us!” Not much else.
Around a week ago I found out that I’m pregnant! It’s been a super happy time and our extended family has been so supportive.
The one thing that continues to bother me is how much SIL has passive aggressively insisted that her spell “worked” and was solely responsible for my pregnancy.
I get that those are her beliefs but it’s weirding me out how much she wants me to acknowledge and validate her spells and magic stuff.
I haven’t said anything to her or in the family chat but I’ve heard from my husband that she’s been talking shit behind my back, calling me ungrateful and rude for not even mentioning her spells when I was thanking family for their support.
AITA if I continue to ignore her? I’m thankful she took effort out to support us but I don’t want to be like “yes your fertility spell was responsible for our pregnancy, thanks so much!”
I don’t even believe in witchcraft so I don’t know why I should claim so in front of everyone. My husband thinks I don’t owe her anything but I’ve been feeling bad inside. AITA?
Let's find out.
danamorrigan writes:
I've been Wiccan for decades.
This is rubbing me the wrong way. I personally have no issue if someone is legit experienced and wants to charge for that experience, but I seriously don't know what a 'master-level' fertility spell would be other than one cast by someone of said experience.
I also don't like the fact that she told you she was going to do this rather than asking you if it was something you wanted.
While your thanks could be construed as consent, it still seems pretty high-handed, and consent for even beneficial spells is typically considered important.
The whole thing just comes off as pretentious. And while it's absolutely a small minority, there is definitely a subset of people who basically think they're hot shit because they are In Charge Of A Coven And Have Been Initiated To The Nth Degree.
Most of the Wiccan/Pagan community is not like that, which is one of the things I like about it.
But much like Christian evangelists who are convinced that they have a more direct channel to God than anyone else, they do exist.
So, in short, you don't owe her anything, and a general group thanks for support seems perfectly reasonable to me. NTA.
serialzero writes:
NTA First, I used to be pagan, and it's my understanding that if you're casting a spell that involves another person, you need that person's express permission to do so, otherwise, it's a big no-no and can have serious spiritual repercussions for the caster.
She broke a huge rule, so it sounds like she doesn't really understand her own faith as well as she proclaims to. This, combined with the fact that she charges for these services, leads me to believe she's just another con artist using faith as a cover story.
Getting butt-hurt over not being credited for the whole affair is another red flag, in my opinion. She should not need other people to validate her beliefs for her.
Aggressively pressuring you into doing so, knowing you don't share her beliefs, seems counterintuitive and frankly, highly suspicious. Again, it sounds like she doesn't really get the gist of Wicca, and it merely using it as some sort of power trip or ego boost.
I apologize if I seem overly critical of your SIL. Despite the fact that I'm an atheist now, it still gets under my skin when people warp a religion for their own personal gain or glory.
callmeclark writes:
NTA - I think anyone can pretty easily sub in “hardcore Christian praying for you” for “witch stuff” and see how obnoxious taking credit for your pregnancy is.
Congratulations to you! So sorry that your SIL is trying to make your pregnancy about herself.