When this woman is concerned for her sister, she asks Reddit:
My sister is 6 months pregnant and I’ve come to visit her and my mom for a couple of days. She’s still in high school, doesn’t have a job, and is living our mom (who also doesn’t have a job either).
The thing is, my sister has paid no mind to all of these concerns. It’s important to note that my sister’s boyfriend (the father of her baby) has passed away. She swears up and down she’s fine and has only received required counseling on it. I find it best to comfort her when I see her rather than lecture her.
I’ve been patient with my sister, I really have. She loves to talk about all the cute things about a baby, so I go along with it. That was until we went to the store. She wanted to buy a baby stroller.
We got to the cashier, and her card declined. When she checked her account, there was $93 in it. 93 bucks. And she was laughing. That about did it for me. I bought the stroller and kept composure until we went outside. I told her that she needed to get real and have a plan down because there will be a baby here pretty soon. She started crying and hasn’t spoken to me since.
I admit, I was harsh, and there was definitely a better way to go about this, but what I told her was real. I would be more than happy to sit down and make a plan for her on how to balance a job, childcare, and school, but whenever I bring it up, she steers away from the subject. AITA?
thirdtimesacharm writes:
Realistically, this is super hard for fully grown adults who are single parents and have chosen to take on this combination of tasks. I think YOU need tone realistic about the challenges of what you're expecting from your sister. NAH.
coldbruise writes:
I can't fathom letting OP off the hook for screaming at his sister in public by saying he's NTA. At best this is a NAH or YTA. This girl is a victim. Her only role model at home is her unemployed mentally unwell mother. The girl gets pregnant and then her child's father literally dies... and she is so psychologically unequipped for this that she just turns to laughing everything off.
Which makes sense because she's a kid! A kid with zero frame of reference on how to be a responsible adult, let alone a mother. OP is the adult. OP knows firsthand exactly how this girl has been neglected by her mother and how that has affected her mental state.
That doesn't mean OP can't be upset about the burden that his been placed upon him, but screaming at this under-developed, traumatized young girl for not knowing how to be responsible is fairly reprehensible in my view.
bogwitch writes:
YTA.I read this comment after saying basically the same thing to OP. How is berating your traumatized and neglected younger sister going to change her situation? Do something actually useful and take her down to the nearest WIC office and get in touch with your state's resources for children and families. I can't believe the NTA judgements on here.