Woman throws engagement party, gets accused of 'alienating' brother's vegan GF.
When this woman is annoyed with her brother's vegan gf, she asks Reddit:
'AITA for making my brother's vegan gf feel 'alienated' at my engagement dinner?'
I (24F) recently got engaged and had an engagement party dinner this past weekend. I am currently still receiving backlash from this and want to get some outside opinions if I was in the wrong.
My fiancé and I invited both of our immediate family and close friends to this dinner (about 30 people).
The dinner was held at a nice Italian restaurant in my city. Our invites gave our guests the option to choose between a meat option and a fish option for their mains.
It's important to note the only people in both mine and my fiancé's family that have I guess food restrictions are my dad and step mom, as they're pescatarian. But a lot of people in our family love seafood so the fish option was chosen more than the meat option.
My younger brother (20M) contacted me about a week before the dinner to RSVP and ask if he can bring a plus one, his new girlfriend. He chose meat option.
Now my brother dates around a lot and is always bringing new girls around, so I wasn't aware that he was even in a relationship. I told him sure and that I'd have an extra seat for her.
Night of the dinner comes, everyone is having a good time, I met my brothers new gf, she seemed very sweet.
When it came time to eat she pulled one of the waiters aside and LOUDLY asked him 'is there any vegan options?'
The waiter looked confused and said 'we have a fish and a meat option for the mains. I can offer you a salad and some roasted potatoes and other veggies as a substitute if you wish'.
Brothers gf started get mouthy with him and said 'well what if I don't want a salad huh? You just assume because I'm vegan I only eat salads? What if I want some pasta? What kind of restaurant is this, this is discrimination'.
My brother started trying to calm her down, but she started going off on ME saying how 'why would you pick a restaurant that doesn't have vegan options? MANY people are vegan nowadays it makes me feel alienated that you couldn't even think to accommodate me'.
I explained to her that the only people that have food restrictions here are pescatarians, so that's what I considered when I chose the restaurant. I didn't even know she was coming until a week ago, the reservation had been booked a month ago.
She started saying it's embarrassing on my part that I can't accommodate all my guests, and called me 'small-minded' I told her 'sorry I didn't think to accommodate you I'll consider that in the future, hopefully you'll be around long enough for me to do able to do so'.
She ended up leaving. My brother walked out with her, and has been messaging me that I should apologize to her because I embarrassed her in front of everyone. I told him she embarrassed herself.
My moms also been on my case to apologize to be the bigger person and keep the peace. AITA for making her feel alienated?
Let's find out.
windergardemis writes:
Oh for the love of god, do not apologize to her. Who does she think she is to complain like that? The way she talked to the waiter proves that she has no manners and the way she talked to you tells me that she is rude, spoiled and brat.
She embarrassed herself infront of everyone by this inappropriate attitude and you were too kind to her, bravo. Easy NTA. Your brother is TA for taking her side and she is THE TA here.
misstikitorch writes:
NTA. I don't have restrictions but I am a slightly picky eater, who used to be a very picky eater. I have never gotten mad at someone feeding a large number of people for not accommodating my choice of food.
\I just eat what little I can and eat something I'm okay with eating later, this is my own plight and I wouldn't expect everyone else to not get what they want for my decisions. And this is especially the case when OP didn't know who this girl was before this meal. NTA.
creatableworld6 writes:
NTA, OP. Your brother’s girlfriend was incredibly rude and your brother sounds like a jerk. If anything they owe you an apology.