Teenager calls stepmom 'creepy,' her dad says, 'don't be heartless, she's grieving.'
When this teenage girl is annoyed with her stepmom, she asks Reddit:
'AITA for telling my stepmother to stop being creepy?'
I (16F) am the daughter of divorced parents. My dad got married 2 years ago to Megan after 1 year of dating.
Megan isn't a bad person, she treats me and my brothers (13M and 13M) very well.
She lost her daughter 5 years ago at the same age as mine in a car accident. She is much better, but still suffers on her daughter's birthday and death. She's already told me that I physically look like her (short brown hair and we're both tall).
In the past, my parents had custody which my father stayed with us on weekends and on holidays.
But my father got full custody after my mother had to travel to take care of my grandmother (cancer) and it would be impossible for us to go with her, but she visits monthly.
My brothers and I have been living with my dad and Megan for 6 months. The 4 first months were pretty ok...
But I've started to notice that she's really on top of my studies, because (according to her) next year is my senior year and getting through college is hard.
My parents don't charge (nag me -?-), they trust me to keep my grades, but I'm not the type to stay on top of books, just normal study, but it seems to bother Megan, especially when I'm not in exam period (I'm more relaxed about it).
Several times, I've heard her call me by her daughter's name, no, we don't have similar names (fake name, my name is Anne and her daughter was called Kate), even though I corrected, she continues.
I talked to my father, my mother talked to him, that I didn't like being charged (nagged -?-) they aren't that kind of parent and that it bothered me all the time when she called me by her daughter's name (even outside of 'fights').
He always says he's going to talk to her and to be patient, but it hasn't improved the situation so I doubt he's spoken.
Friday, she started scolding me for being on the couch all afternoon watching Netflix (watching the new season of Fate: Winx hehe).
I reached my limit after she called me by her daughter's name again and said 'I'm not 'Kate', Megan, stop treating me like I'm her. This is bothering me and this behavior is very creepy' .
She started crying and locked herself in her room. When my father found out what happened, he got angry at me and told me to apologize, because I was very insensitive talking like that and bringing her a wound that I knew was wide open to her.
My mom is on my side, but Megan has barely left the room since the fight, I'mfeeling bad...AITA?
Let's find out.
calliopegrey writes:
She said it was every time she was trying to parent her. She shouldn't even be doing that, parenting op is up to her actual parents. Step mom is just overstepping and trying to replace her late daughter with op. NTA.
mischiviousbish writes:
She clearly needs an intensive therapy ASAP before starting on the family therapy because of how she imposes on OP which is too smothering, IMHO. TO OP, NTA.
Talk to your dad and see if he could get Megan a therapy ASAP because she still hasn't gotten over her daughter's death. That has me concerned more.
I can see how upset you are because she's smothering you and treating you as if you're her late daughter. I'm sorry that you had to deal with that.
justkillintim99 writes:
I think the big thing that makes this harsh is the not acknowledging or apologizing for the mistake. And it does not seem stepmom is attempting to improve or change.
OP is NTA. This is a major issue. And your stepmother needs to look into grief counseling. As much as she may wish or imagine her child is not replaceable, and she definitely shouldn’t be trying to force you into that role.