Stepmom refuses to accommodate stepdaughter's 'weird' new diet.
When this stepmom is annoyed, she asks Reddit:
'AITA for refusing to accommodate my stepdaughters new diet?'
I (25) have two children (5, one on the way) with my husband, my husband has a daughter (12) we’ve got 60/40 custody.
In our household we have a few dietary restrictions; my son doesn’t like certain textures/smells, my husband is dairy intolerant/gluten intolerant as well as not liking certain foods due to texture or smells (I’m not even allowed fish, noodles or mushrooms in the house) as well as currently there’s a few foods that make me nauseated.
It’s not picky eating for my son, he has global delay, his teachers are trying to get us help for a diagnosis for autism.
My stepdaughter has recently wanted to go vegan, at her mothers she’s 100% accommodated but it’s easier there since it’s just those two.
I tried, I asked my stepdaughter and her mother for food recommendations, I’ve googled recipes etc and I’ve even just cut out the middle man and got frozen things but each time I’ve tried either my son and husband didn’t like, or isn’t something I feel she can eat daily as my husband has said frozen foods are limited to once/twice a week.
So I told my stepdaughter those twice a week we can either make a separate meal together or frozen, but it isn’t ideal for me to cook two different meals every night when I then work nights and it isn’t affordable in the long term.
Husband said I’m giving up too early, making custody harder etc and stepdaughter has taken to giving me the silent treatment…
An example would be tonights dinner; steak, broccoli and new potatoes - only one meal, I don’t eat steak so I just had some broccoli because when I don’t like something I just have the side, like when we had hotdogs I had some onions in a roll.
I know it’ll come up that my husband can cook, he tends to overseas on things to the point where it’s overbearingly salty or nobody but my husband likes it. AITA?
Let's find out.
parsimonioussalad writes:
NTA but oh your husband!Your husband over seasons when he cooks so only he can eat the food. He has decreed unilaterally that frozen foods are limited to once or twice a week. He holds you entirely responsible for meeting his daughter's desires to 'make custody easier.'
You work nights and are pregnant and yet are responsible for cooking to everyone's tastes and textures - to the point that... you cook food YOU don't eat and then only eat the side, not getting adequate nutrition for yourself and your baby on the way. It's not the dietary restrictions that are the real issue here, it's the husband.
cyclonichavonic writes:
Sorry for your situation because it is honestly ridiculous. You’re not allowed to eat certain foods because your husband is intolerant? Tough shit. He can eat something different.
You’re accommodating everyone else, but you’re not allowed to accommodate you, and I’m all for letting your kids eat what they want to, but this is your house, and if you can’t afford for your stepdaughter to practice veganism at 12 years old, you don’t have to cater to this kid just because she wants to be a vegan right now.
This could even be a phase at her age- no one really knows, but as long as you’re making healthy foods that everyone can eat, there should be no complaints.
Also, five year olds are picky eaters. And you can make them something separate, but your entire household should not suffer just because your husband is an asshole and wants to control your personal dietary decisions.
You need to stop putting everyone else before you all the time. You also have the right to have things that you want, and you don’t have to sacrifice that for the sake of everyone else in your life. NTA.