15 people share the creepiest or weirdest thing their partner has said in their sleep.
Living with a sleep-talker can be a truly wild time.
You don't need to have a Freudian penchant for dream interpretation in order to find the subconscious ramblings of a partner both entertaining and fascinating. Even if it's all just garbage brain juice leaking out at night, sleep thoughts still feel like a cosmic joke.
In a popular Ask Reddit thread, people with partners who sleep-talk shared the weirdest, creepiest, and funniest things they've heard.
1. From cardedformilk:
I was told by my fiancé that he came to bed one night after I had fallen asleep and started rubbing my back, which apparently prompted me to sleep-say “This just in! Local boy massages...other local boy!”
I am a 26-year-old female but that night I was a young 19th-century newsboy at heart.
2. From thoughtcasserole:
Completely at random: 'OPEN THE WINDOW ABIGAIL IM BURNING LIKE A MEATBALL' we don't even know an Abigail.
3. From TheBottleRed:
“Bleach your a**hole already, would ya?”
He sleeps very hard, we can have conversations while he’s asleep. I’ve got several of them on video and they’re some of my most favorite things
4. From ewhit276:
One time while sleeping I grabbed my partner by the shoulder and told her “hey, people are just stacks of years” like it was the most important thing in the world.
5. From Tangata_Puhuruhuru:
My wife once in the middle of a dead sleep just did like a possessed scream/yell. It was from quiet to loud. Kind of like aaaaaAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH. And then she started snoring immediately after. I didn’t go back to sleep for a while.
6. From zikeel:
Once, me and our roommate were downstairs, while my husband was sleeping upstairs. We heard him yelling in his sleep and I figured he was having a nightmare and went to check on him.
Turns out he was, in fact, not yelling. in his dream he had a bunch of creepy ghost children trapped in a hole and was mocking them by saying 'WoOoOoO~ WoOoOoO~... b**ches.'
7. From Riverforasong:
Wife: Oh no
Me: What's wrong?
Wife: I forgot
Me: Forgot what?
Wife: Gravity
Me: You forgot gravity?
Wife: Yeah
Me: It's okay, you can't forget gravity
Wife: I can't?
Me: No, it's okay.
Wife: Good.
Out like a light.
8. From strictlytacos:
My husband's Dad died on a fishing boat in the bering sea last year. It was a terrible way to go and he yells DAD very loudly like he's trying to warn him a line is about to hit him.
9. From lalammle:
I have two great ones:
I had stayed up late and my husband was asleep in bed. We had creaky wood floors, so I was walking slowly into the bedroom trying not to make too much noise.
I stepped on a creaky spot, and husband shifted in bed and then said, in a very cheeky/smiling tone: 'I have a machine...that will shoot you...if you move around. It'll shoot you right now!' Then he was back to being dead asleep.
I was reading in bed, husband turned to snuggle into me and then this conversation: Him: (in a cutesy, flirty tone) 'Coupons.' Me: 'Coupons?' Him: 'Yeah, coupons.'
10. From TheBrontosaurus:
I’m Im the sleep talker/walker. One night my husband woke me up because my sister was calling him in the middle of the night. I was very worried and asked her what was wrong. She was practically in tears and managed to squeak out “thank god you’re ok! I was so scared!”
I guess in my sleep I had called her mumbled then set my phone down next to my speaker which was playing the audiobook that had fallen asleep to. What she heard was me whispering then a strange man talking. She thought I had been kidnapped.
She texted and called me and when I didn’t answer she called my husband to see if I was ok. He was confused and tried to assure her I was sleeping peacefully in bed. I’ve also ordered bras and three gallons of almond milk off amazon. I’m not allowed to have my phone near my bed anymore.
11. From spurtz_:
My roommate sleep talks almost every night and I once walked in on him sobbing. Full on bawling.
I asked if he was good and he said in the calmest voice “yeah sure I just wanted to see it to the end”....he doesn’t remember it one bit.
The runner-up was when he burst into laughter and then said “why did none you try to chop my head off just then?”
12. From alaricc:
While camping with a friend -- who wakes up an hour before me -- I had apparently been repeating 'Come here boy' for the past 15 minutes before I woke up. I don't know why as I've never said that.
13. From Zkv:
My wife swears up and down, that while she was reading before bed, I said: 'I see you didn't bring the bag of leaves, so I know you're not serious.'
14. From JustHumanGarbage:
My ex's kid had a bed in the same room with us (he was 4) and one night I happened to just wake up and look over at him and he rose form his bed and stared out at the wall and whispered ' who are you?' and at this point I was in full nope mode, and then he whispered 'don't tell them' and then flopped back in his bed.
15. From Yippiekay-yay:
My boyfriend last week: 'Just take my body!'