Being cock-blocked is such a disparaging feeling.
Here you were, so close to connecting with a crush, and then some force of nature (most likely a person) swoops in to ruin the cinematic moment.
While being cock blocked is annoying in the moment, it can be pretty funny after the fact.
I was on a trip at a hotel for a conference my parents were attending. There was a girl there whose parents were attending the same conference, so they suggested we hang out during our week while they were busy.
Towards the end of the week, I'm hanging out with this girl in her parents' suite while they are at one of their meetings.
We've been flirting all week and this is the perfect opportunity to make something happen. She turns to me and comes right out with it and asks 'Do you want to kiss me?' (Girl making the first move=awesome) I of course respond yes.
As I'm leaning in for the kiss, she turns to the T.V. and says, 'Oh, The Princess Bride! I love this movie!' And turns all her attention back to the TV.
Before the movie ended, her parents had returned, and I never got that kiss nor whatever might have followed. Which makes little sense to me, since my long history with The Princess Bride suggests it is one of the more classic panty-dropping films.
TL;DR Cock blocked by The Princess Bride. Inconceivable!
GF and I are in my bedroom late at night getting intimate. I recieve a text from a friend asking me what I'm up to, I tell him I'm about to get laid and that I'll talk to him later.
Next thing I know there's a bang on the window (I lived on the bottom floor) and my friend is just standing there looking through the window with a huge sh*t-eating grin consuming his face. Needless to say, the mood was ruined.
In college, I was at this bar night with my buddy and the rest of our program. His not-so-sane ex was also there but he was getting along great with this girl he had met at the pre-drink.
Around 1:30 while he was in the process of inviting the girl back to his place, the ex walks up to her and says: 'We used to date. We went for HIV tests together yesterday. We're still waiting for the results.'
Drunken logic led to the girl instantly believing the ex and essentially running away. The perfect cock block.
Let me set the scene: It's 4 am at the usual raunchy teenage party. Dark room downstairs wherein 3 different couples are mostly to fully naked and going about their business.
I burst in, flick on the light, and demand that everyone try some of the vanilla pudding I just made.
Junior year of college and just moved into apartment with 3 (male) friends. Within the first week, we meet 4 female neighbors and start drinking and hanging out with them.
One night, John (tipsy), Dave (sober and recently broken up), and the rest of us are talking with the girls when someone mentions that Dave is amazing at the guitar.
Susy innocently and enthusiastically asks 'Really Dave? How well do you play the guitar?'
John instantly yells back 'WELL ENOUGH TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!'
Susy meekly replies '...kinda inappropriate John...'
I was about 16 or so, not a virgin but not exactly swimming in vagina. Living with just me and my dad. One of my ex-girlfriends from public school randomly calls me up during the summer break and says she'd like to catch up, hang out, that kinda stuff.
She was a real cool chick so I figured we would hang out and probably flirt a little. Well it got hot and heavy real fast for some reason and so we're basically dry humping on the couch and she hasn't even been there an hour yet.
She says things like 'You know, I always wondered what it'd be like to f*ck you now' and my already boner got it's own boner hearing that kinda sh*t. Needless to say, I was pretty happy until I realized I didn't have a condom.
So I sprint up to my dad's room (who is at work) and dig around his drawers for awhile until I finally found one.
So I go back downstairs and start mackin' on her some more and as I'm rounding all the bases, about to start heading home I hear my dad come down the stairs happily announcing he brought taco bell home for dinner.
It was my favourite fast food at the time, as we quickly leap into 'Just watching TV' mode.
Since it was a small-ish house there would have definitely been no privacy and she didn't want to do anything with my dad there (who would have been cool with it as long as he knew I was using protection) but I understand where she was coming from.
TL;DR Cockblocked by tacos.
Out at the pub with some friends...kiss a girl. Bring her back to my place, where I live with 3 other guys. Two guys goes to bed, one follows me back into my room WITH the girl.
She gets into bed...like HEAVY HINT, and he gets in with her. No word of a lie. Haha. I was pissed.
I was visiting my buddy at college who was in a frat.
There was a party starting but several of us were sitting in his room, rather intoxicated already. Everyone leaves except for myself and one girl, in which it was pretty clear sexy time was going to happen with.
Fooling around, the 'do you have a condom' line that we all hate, I comply, she proceeds to mount me, and as insertion is about to happen my buddy busts in the door with a glowing hot fire poker cackling his a*s off as he charges me with it.
Natural reaction, I use my hand to bat it away. Except...I grab it and it burns the f*ck out of my hand.
Said dude runs out of the room continuing to cackle a very maniacal tune, meanwhile my hand borderline needs medical attention. Busty Sinclair and I put on enough clothing for it to be acceptable to be out in public and I begin to repair.
The situation is made worse when every 'HIIII!!!! I'M PRE-MED' has an opinion on what I should do, which really just ends up being me taking a bunch of Vicodin and continuing to drink.
For all of the F*CK THAT DUDE KILL HIM statements that will come...this isn't a regular thing, where he is on that level of boneheadedness, this was isolated. I never did get back at him, but that's probably a topic for another thread. Anyway.
The nonsense continues in the morning when I wake up and go to take a piss...I was still wearing the condom. That was pretty confusing, I'm not sure if that was a blackout round 2 condom, or if it was the OC.
TL;DR Cock block via literally burning me.
This might be slightly different than the rest of the stories as I'm a woman but this thread brought the story to mind. I used to live in a dorm with a lady I'll call L.
I thought L was a pretty cool roommate for a few months until I realized that she cock blocked anytime we were out at the bar. The second a guy showed interest in me she'd pull me away, push into the conversation, storm out in a fit and so on.
It should be mentioned that she had a boyfriend at the time so it wasn't like she was a vengeful forever alone or secretly attracted to me. She just hated for another woman to get attention over her.
She did not like not being the center of attention for one moment. I found out later she did similar things to other roommates she had.
The most ridiculous thing she would do was time showers for when a guy was coming over so she'd have to walk by in a towel. She'd then stand around and talk about herself. At least once she purposely flashed the room.
She'd never try to sleep with any of these guys but I did stop bringing them over after awhile. What makes all of this cock blocking she did so fantastic though is that I am now dating her ex-boyfriend. I didn't do it to be vindictive, it just happened.
She probably did help it along though as she would test him by trying to push him toward me while purposely driving guys away from me. I've been with him for five years now. So, thanks L.
I was in the high school senior year giving my best charm and clearly its working well. She's showing all the signs, progressively getting to a more flirtatious, relaxed tone, and we're having the most amazing conversation ever.
My idiot of a best friend comes by and almost as if he could smell my success in the air decides to run it.
He enjoys controversial humor, so he interrupts with 'Hey n***er what's up'(I'm black, he's Latino) then looks at the girl and says 'Hey its that chick you told me you wanted to f*ck, I thought you didn't like spics though' and walks off.
I couldn't salvage the damage he did and ended up in the friend zone.
Went out with some friends in Orange County, CA, to a bar to watch the Angels game (this was about 2003/2004, after they beat my beloved Giants in the World Series).
The game ends and I'm sitting with a few friends at a table and behind us are three gals, all very attractive, drinking some Amstel Lights.
As I'm drinking the same thing when mine arrives I toast them, they are receptive so I turn my chair around and join their table.
Things are going well, flirty smiles and light touches to the forearm, when this not-so-bright gal who's with us grabs my arm because she is telling some inane story and wants to show how she ripped this dude's sleeve once and use me as a prop.
I tell the gals 'this will just be a second', turn so she can tell her idiotic anecdote, and when she's done and I turn back around and Frankie Rodriguez, Juan Rivera, and a few other
Angels are now in the bar, hovering over the three gals I was talking to, and took my chair. Seeing how these strong millionaire athletes are now physically blocking me from getting to the girls I give up, sit back with my friends and just shake my head.
TL; DR: Members of the Los Angeles Angels who beat my favorite team in the World Series later stole a table of gals I was flirting with.
I was 17, still in high school. This girl that I had been trying to nail started calling me at home (before cell phones were big).
After about 2 weeks of talking to her on the phone/hanging out at school she was DTF. One day I was out with some friends and she called my house and my brother answered.
She had never met my brother, never talked to him. But my brother somehow used some swag and f*cked her that night.
This recently happened at a house party I threw. I meet a cute girl (redhead even) from a different school and we hit it off. She's with other friends, including the standard mother-goose figure of the group.
Well, I take her up to my place (I live in a single up a stepladder) and we start making out. The second I reach up her shirt...BOOM! Pierced nipples. It was as if the skies had opened up and angels were singing 'Hallelujah!'
Right when I make this glorious discovery, her mother-goose friend pops her head up and demands that she leave with the group. She does. Lik dis if u cry evertim. :'(
Laying in bed with this girl, when suddenly I get terrible explosive diarrhea. Not a good time.
I was trying to hook up with my now boyfriend, and it was going really well. His friend lives next door to the party we were at, and we headed over there. Friend is strange, and said we could f*ck on his floor and went downstairs.
We get down to it, and before we could do anything, he comes back in, tells us to disregard him, and gets onto his computer.
It was quiet for about 10 more minutes, we tried to get back into it, and this guy just blared Forrest Gump dubstep for the next 3-4 hours.
Most of which he was trying to hold conversations, and eventually just took to hitting my boyfriend with his boxing gloves. Totally killed it.
TL;DR: Cock blocked by dubstep and boxing gloves.