So, when a conflicted groom decided to vent to the wonderful wits of Reddit about his wife's reaction to her friend performing a song at their wedding talent show, people were quick to offer their saltiest or most supportive opinions.
Her friend who sang networked with a guest who wants to potentially work with her. She has become bitter since...
I (m28) knew her since college, and I'll get that out of the way first. The past few days have shown a different side of her that's a little surprising because Kate is her best friend from college.
My wife (Nancy) wanted to do a mini talent show at our reception, and she talked it up beforehand too. She read a poem that she made for the event, and Kate performed a song that she wrote.
Long story short, one of the guests who I invited is into producing, and he reached out to her after she performed. They exchanged information, and Kate was really excited. He wanted to network with her following the reception, and she even thanked my wife for hosting the talent show over text.
But Nancy became really bitter about it, and that's why I'm writing this. She hasn't responded to Kate's message, and she said she regretted doing the talent show too. She also asked me to block Edward (the producer) on my socials/contacts, and I told her that that seemed a bit much.
She didn't like my answer and said that I was wrong to 'not take her side after just getting married,' but I told her that she should be happy for her friend. She didn't like that either and vented to some in our friend group about how Kate was 'bragging', but some of them disagreed.
She said she didn't want to hang out with them for the time being, and that included me too. Two of her girlfriends even texted me that she was 'overreacting' and that they were also surprised to see her act that way (they also asked if she was okay too).
My dad is suggesting counseling and said that asking me to remove friends is an unhealthy way to start a marriage, and I'm honestly more than a little scared. I asked if she'd be open to counseling, but she said there was 'no need' because 'Kate was her friend first' and I 'shouldn't choose Kate over her.' I just want to ask what to do next since she refused counseling and sees no issue with cutting off our friends
Edit: I want to add that Nancy complained that her poem didn't get as good of a reception as Kate's song. Kate didn't study music in college, but practices on the side, and her text was really thankful for the opportunity that the talent show provided. Kate is also engaged to her long-time boyfriend.
Of course a musical performance is going to be more of a crowd pleaser at a wedding than a poem. Also, was this just a talent show Of course, the jury of internet strangers was eager to weigh in on this audition for 'The Voice' at a wedding. Here's what people had to say:
wonderlandresident13 said:
Your dad is absolutely right, this isn't a healthy way to start a marriage, or a healthy way to act in general, and she should get counseling. But if she refuses I honestly can't really say what you should do other than keep trying to talk some sense into her. Whatever happens, don't give in to her unreasonable demands. You and your friends haven't done anything wrong, and you shouldn't have to cut them off.
Ornery_Stick_7846 said:
Your wife and insecure and jealous of her friend, she needs to grow up and start supporting her friend Kate like any good friend should. What woman/friend wouldn’t be thrilled for their friend to be given this opportunity? Your wife needs a reality check and it’s not all about her. Good luck to your marriage
Ok_Strategy_57 said:
What a strange reaction. The talent show was literally her idea. It sounds like she's just jealous and felt that her friend outshined her on her wedding day, but that's not the friend or the producer's fault. Definitely don't cut out your friends, it's not healthy or reasonable for your wife to request that. Are there any other friends/loved ones she might listen to about this?
Jen5872 said:
So your wife feels upstaged on her wedding day. That would be a her problem as she's the one who set up this talent show. Did she really think no one would out perform her and her poem? She should be happy for her friend, not jealous.
Everyone agreed unanimously here that this groom is right to be concerned about his wife's reaction to her friend's success at an event that was completely her idea. Clearly there is some underlying jealousy that needs to addressed immediately before moving forward with her career, marriage, or friendships. Someone else's success is not your failure! Good luck, everyone.