19 employees share the joke that every customer thinks they're the first one to tell.
Working any job that requires regular encounters with the general public can turn any otherwise chill, compassionate, and forgiving person into a grumpy, jaded hermit...
There are only so many times you can slap on a phony smile and try to giggle at the joke from the Karen who only two minutes ago threatened your job over soy milk. So, when a Reddit user asked, 'What is the joke at your workplace that customers always say thinking they're original, but in reality you hear it every day?' people were ready to share the most irritating jokes they're forced to fake-laugh at every shift.
1.
Doctor. When saying goodbye to a patient, the patient responds with: 'Goodbye, I hope to never see you again!' But I'm guilty of this joke, too; if the patient says 'see you later!' I answer 'I hope not!' - [deleted]
2.
When I worked for an ice delivery company: 'You sure have a cool job! Get it? Because ice is cold...' Heard it every damn day - dtidew
3.
'Ha, I guess you must never want to get married!' I'm a divorce lawyer. - JackWagon
4.
Is there anything else I can help you with? YOU CAN GIVE ME TONIGHT'S LOTTERY NUMBERS - kittycuddler
5.
Used to work at a hospital which did surgery.
It was therefore very important to ascertain what people were allergic to. The go to response for the comedians out there was always:
Pain. - Blacky31
6.
I wait tables. The food is good where I work. Every day someone says, 'It wasn't any good' after they've scraped the plate clean. I sometimes make the joke myself because it's a proven fact your tips go up when you make your customers laugh. It works every time. - zerocoke
7.
I work in a burger restaurant. The word 'burger' is in the company name. There are pictures of burgers all over the walls.'Hey man... do you sell burgers?' - Sherman_McCoy
8.
I work at a grocery store and if we have multiple lanes open with no customers people will stand and look at us and say 'who wants me?' No one wants you. Just pick a f*cking lane. We all hate our jobs. - xAnonymousFTWx
9.
I say my name is blank and I'll be your server. They say my name is Fred and I'll be your customer. - lolalodge
10.
I work as a bank teller, and at least once a day someone making a withdrawal says 'Feel free to throw a little extra in there!' - BigPapaD
11.
I used to work at a guitar store...If I hear one more person say that 'her G-string broke when I was fingering her' blood will follow! - Whisker_Biscuits
12.
Med student here:
'So Mr. X, what brings you in today?'
'My car'
... I still laugh every time - valerikamensky
13.
'What account is that on?'
'Savings, well I call it spendings, har har!' - SirCharlesworth
14.
I work at a zoo/amusement park.
'Can we feed the kids to the lions?'
yeah, go ahead.
Our prices are separated by age groups and little kids ages 0-2 get in free so when people are telling me how many people they have for each age the adult will be like
'Oh, I'm a toddler! hahaha!'
or sometimes like 'We've got three adults, but they ACT like they're kids hurhurhruhur'
yeah you're a real comedian, bud. But honestly, it's nice to have a customer who is willing to joke around, even if the jokes are dumb. I'd much rather have that then the as*holes who complain to me about admission pricing! Parking is 6 dollars, cry me a river, I'm making you pay for it! - PinkAlienSlut
15.
A co-worker's father was a vacuum repair man. Every time: 'this vacuum sucks, or rather, it doesn't suck!' - kaihatsusha
16.
My brother lives in New York and plays the upright bass. He says that about 90 percent of the time when he's on the subway, people say, 'Bet you wish you played the flute!' It's hilarious how angry he gets about this. - JohnnyHighGround
17.
I'm a banker. Customer: 'Are you handing out free samples?' - Sibolt
18.
When I worked in retail and an item wouldn't scan, EVERYONE would say, 'Oh, so it must be free then! Hehehehe.' - hammayolettuce
19.
I used to work the ticket booth at Legoland. I got 'Are YOU made of Legos?' at least twice a day. - OneShortSleepPast