1. The Nicholas Cangel

The lights and the tinsel and those homemade ornaments you inherited from your Gramma, they're all just noise. It's the topper that tells your houseguests how you get your Christmas on. Do you dig angels? Do you rock a star? Or do you follow the example of the toppers on this page, and fly your psycho flag atop the scotch pine with a loud, boisterous, Merry Batshit Christmas? Whatever you do, be not ashamed. It's your tree. Tis the season to make it as unsettling as possible.