Cold-blooded revenge can be sweet–but sometimes, petty revenge is even better.
A recent AskReddit thread prompted the question: "What's the most ultimate petty revenge you've seen or been a part of?" And unsurprisingly, thousands of people responded, sharing some of the pettiest petty revenge stories we've ever heard. From subtly messing with horrific coworkers' computers to being a stickler for one penny to stealing puzzle pieces, these people are truly experts in the field of petty revenge.
Here are 16 epic tales of petty revenge.
1. Sorakoi witnessed someone use pettiness to stand up for an innocent woman and her baby.
Crossing at a busy downtown intersection, a very impatient driver waiting to make a turn honked at a lady pushing a stroller (she had the right of way). I slowed down, but the guy next to me straight up stopped in front of the car, then bent down to re-tie his shoelaces.
2. According to underthetootsierolls, pettiness is not something one simply grows out of.
My mom and dad. This happened when I was in my late twenties. My mom and I were in the car. My dad called and they started bickering with each other. My mom got irritated, and hung up on him. He called her right back, and when she answered he hung up on HER! Didn’t even say a word just waited for her to pick and and hung up. It was so petty and hilarious to see my parents acting like children. I couldn’t stop laughing. They’ve been married over 35 years. I still get tickled when I think about that.
3. Devoidz has a delightfully petty tip for getting out of spam email lists.
I saw an ad for a work from home type job. It didn't sound scammy and sounded sort of legit. So I asked for more info from the website. enter your email thing. It was crap, and was sending me spam several times a day. For whatever reason blocking it didn't work.
I got annoyed one day and answered back, stop spamming me. The guy actually answered. He actually monitors that address. He told me to unsubscribe. Which did nothing. After about another week of it, I came up with an idea.
I took his email address he answered from and added it to his own list. Then signed it up for any other spam I could find. A few days later it stopped spamming me.
4. Typingbutnotworking got the ultimate petty revenge on her brother's cheating ex-girlfriend.
My little brother and his girlfriend came to stay at my house for the weekend, and the girlfriend was super self centered and obnoxious. When they left, she forgot her clothes and toiletries because she left them sprawled all over my bathroom.
About a week later, she and my brother moved into an apartment together. After he paid for the moving truck, deposit and utilities, she cheated on him with her ex and kicked him out of the apartment. This left him broke, homeless, and heart broken.
In the days after the breakup, she kept calling and emailing him several times per day, demanding that he ask me to ship her clothes and toiletries back to her ("I mean, it's really important. It's my NORTHFACE.") My brother called and pleaded with me to ship them to her so she would stop having a reason to contact him.
Being the loving sister that I am, I gathered up the Really Important Northface sweatshirt, shorts, underwear, shampoo, conditioner, soap and razor. I folded everything nicely. I then wrote a nice note apologizing for taking so long to mail them to her, and let her know that I hope all is well. The note was written in permanent marker, and the paper happened to be resting on the Really Important Northface when I wrote it. Unfortunately, the ink bled straight through the paper and onto the shirt. Also unfortunately, the shampoo, soap and conditioner caps were not tightly secured on their bottles, and the contents leaked out all over the clothes, further spreading the ink. The most unfortunate result, though, was that her razor didn't have any sort of protective cap or container and left little slashes all over the front of the Really Important Northface.
She received the package, and my brother never heard from her again.
5. Whoever was stealing car parts from porcelainvacation's dad had another thing coming.
My dad had an old truck parked on the back of our property that some kept stealing small parts from (cap, rotor, points, etc). We wired it to an electric fence power supply. One evening we heard a bunch of yelling and swearing and went back there and the guy left us some free tools.
6. If you ever find yourself holding a grudge against a jigsaw puzzle lover, perhaps you should try stanciat's genius idea.
My roommate and her SO loved doing elaborate jigsaw puzzles. After I found out she cancelled our lease, leaving me 1 week to find a new place to live, I threw away 1 piece of two different puzzles they were working on. Before you ask, she was able to do this because I was 17, and not able to legally sign a lease.
7. Def_not_myself is here to remind you that pettily trolling meanies with fake Craigslist ads can be very fun.
I started in a new job two years ago and hated a guy that kept joking about me, so I got his phone number and announced his PS4 for sale for like $50.
Same day during lunch he was already nuts because of the calls.
He found a way to remove it, but it was nice to watch
8. Whosyabobby was petty for a penny...and then he did something amazing with it.
I used to deliver pizza for Dominoes. It was my last shift and there was this house that was always rude (I called to asked what the house looked like and they said "I gave you the address" and hung up), never tipped, etc. I got to their house and they gave me a check for 1 cent less that what the total was. I said "I am going to need the extra penny". They grumbled off and took their time hoping I would give up but I just sat there holding the pizza. They finally came back all pissed off and gave me the penny. Note that they had no intention of tipping. They gave me the penny and I chucked it out into the street and left. They saw me do it. It was SATISFYING.
9. Thenevermore52 used pettiness to teach a classmate a brutal lesson about cheating.
During my Freshman year of high school I was in a biology class that was made up of mainly juniors. This one guy, who sat next to me, would always be a jerk to me during class. I always did well on the tests so he would always look over and copy the answers from my Scantron. I'm pretty sure he didn't realize that I knew he was cheating off of me. Well one day I got fed up with this guy messing with me and cheating off of me. So the next test comes around and sure enough he starts copying my answers. I finish the test and so does he. He gets up and turns his test in and comes back to his seat. I looked him in the eyes and proceeded to erase my entire Scantron. I then retook the test, this time marking the correct answers. The look of panic in his eyes was so satisfying. He ended up making a 2% on that test and never cheated off me again.
10. If you're sick of only wearing hand-me-downs, perhaps try taking a page out of damnit_bemo's very petty book.
Being the youngest brother, I would only get hand-me-downs. My older brother rubbed it in my face that he got a brand new pair of PF Flyers after "The Sandlot" came out. Every day, I would stuff the toe of the shoes with tissue paper, adding a little more each day till he thought he outgrew them. Got slightly worn, PF Flyers, after about a month.
11. This cashier was petty as hell on behalf of Irishzombieman...and dang, it was beautiful.
You young'uns here might not believe it, but back in the early 90s, supermarket cashiers had to type every price in by hand.
I was at a Vons in San Diego, walking toward the only open check stand with a single bottle of soda in my hand. Suddenly this hoity toity lady with a cart stacked to the top flew out of one of the aisles like a freight train and cut me off. "I'm in a hurry," she said, then looked away like she was annoyed that I'd been born.
I looked at the cashier. He rolled his eyes and got to work. Five minutes later she's walking out the door and it's my turn.
"You're good," says the cashier. "I put your soda on her tag."
Damn, that felt good.
12. Getting back at a bully is risky...but so, so worth it, according to rottinmongrel.
In grade school, I kept a bag of chips in the same pocket everyday of my backpack. This kid I knew would punch that pocket any chance he could for 5 days in a row. One day I replaced the chips with a bag of sewing pins. He never did it again.
Sweet sweet justice.
13. nyc_gypsy takes semantics very seriously.
Roommate in college was disgustingly messy and a raging bitch. When I had the flu once, I had left a blanket and sweatshirt in the living room to keep warm.
Woke up to a text along the lines of "You're a disgusting pig. The apartment is a disaster. Get all of your belongings out of the living area or we're going to have a problem."
And honestly if she had nicely asked then fine. And if she weren't insanely messy then fine. But she had to go full out bitch.
She had forgotten that I had provided all of the furniture for our apartment. Couch, table, TV etc. All "my belongings."
So, while she was in class, I called up some friends on the football team that occasionally helped people move for spare cash. We loaded up every single piece of furniture onto their truck and just parked it a few blocks away on the street.
Cue my roommate coming home to an empty fucking apartment. Screaming at me and calling me names. I just told her I was following her orders and I moved out "all of my belongings". She was dumbfounded and really had nothing to say.
Obviously brought the furniture back hours later. But certainly proved my point.
Tbh that's only one of many petty points I had to make to that bitch.
14. Tconzz22 took the chicken wings he deserved.
I used to deliver pizza, and one time I had a delivery to a brownstone house with a small stoop. It was either Christmas or thanksgiving week and we had snow/ice a couple of days beforehand.
Well, I pull up and there must have been some sort of family gathering at the house who ordered the food because there were a handful of people outside smoking and talking.
When I get out of the car, one of the people on the porch opened the door and yelled into whoever was supposed to come out and pay for the food.
The woman came to the door as I was walking up the sidewalk, i was carrying a 24 cut pie with a couple of bags filled with wings or whatever inside. I had a decent amount of food in my hands. But as I was walking, I slipped on ice and fell onto the sidewalk while everyone was watching. The massive pizza fell facedown, box open, onto the icy sidewalk to the horror of the hungry onlookers.
I remember being on the ground, in the process of getting up, picking the pizza up off the ground, and hearing this woman screaming at me. She was so mad that I dropped her food. She didn't offer to help me up, she didn't ask if I was ok, she didn't apologize for having ice on her sidewalk, she just flipped out on me.
So now I'm standing there with a mutilated pizza hearing this old woman reem me out in front of her family. I apologized as soon as I fell, but she didn't care. For at least 20-30 seconds she went in on me for dropping the pizza.
So I threw the pizza at her feet onto her porch and got into my car and left. I took her chicken wings with me so I had some sort of proof that I didn't deliver the food and I didn't get paid for it.
I have a lot of stories from delivering, for some reason, this stuck with me for like ten years now.
15. JayOHare's monstrous former coworker is probably still dealing with this petty revenge.
A horrible former coworker always claimed she worked way more hours than she actually did, and when she was at work she just browsed Facebook all day. The doctor/owner was very hands-off and just let her do whatever she wanted (despite me going to him with proof), so I️ decided to take revenge. She was not computer savvy at all, so I removed Internet Explorer from her desktop and installed an identical icon that, when clicked, would instantly restart the computer. It was so satisfying when she would forget and click it, losing anything that she was working on. She would always grumble and complain about the “virus” on her computer. I️ started a new job about three weeks later, and when I️ left it was still giving her problems.
16. And finally, cr0m's friend dropped the mic on a virtual bit by stealthily turning it into a real-life phenomenon. Bow down.
This was petty revenge executed on me by a friend. Executed flawlessly.
At some point back in the late 90s early 00s my friends and I started trolling each other by sending each other links to what were supposed to be legit pictures (normally of each other hanging out, something cool, etc), but were actually pictures of plant stands. It got so bad that we started refusing to click links sent around, and coined the phrase "don't plant stand me."
Flares up and down for several years as my friends move away from NYC and around the country, but continue to share pictures/funny links/etc. We would also keep track of who had gotten who most recently, and I don't even remember what I'd done but I'd plant standed one of them particularly badly.
Fast forward about a year, I'm getting married. Everyone is invited, including this friend who is going to stay at my place during the wedding. She drives up in a rental and asks me to help bring her bags in. I'm so excited to see her I rush out and grab a couple and carry them into the guest room and get her all set up.
It's a great wedding and my wife and I head off to our honeymoon for a week, saying good bye to everyone before we go. When I get back to my house, another week or so goes by before I have to get something from the closet in the guest room. And that's when I find it.
A huge, wrought-iron plant stand, smack in the middle of the room.
This friend of mine found, bought, disassembled, flew to another country, reassembled and left a plant stand in my guest room. And I helped carry it into my own damn house!
Needless to say, she won. We don't plant stand anymore. There's no point.