Rebels: folks who stick it to the man by constantly challenging the system. Feels like the world has too many of these troublemakers sometimes, but without them, society would just be a cesspool of accepted subliminal messages to subdue the populace, right?
So whether they rob napkins from a chain restaurant or drive a mere three miles per hour above the speed limit, here are 27 (slightly-tame) rebels from Reddit who refuse to comply with the system in their own small, yet still vaguely sinister, ways.
1. Aef1991 turns his object of government surveillance into an act of pure rebellion.
I look away or put my phone face down when an ad comes up before a video or something. Thinking you can force me to watch your shit products.
2. BeIow_the_Heavens unveils a devious solution to those still frustrated with snail mail.
All the credit card offers I get in the mail, I tear up any part of it that's not the pre-paid envelope they provide and then I send it back to them.
3. Sunscreeen gets paid to mess with the system.
I worked at coffee chain for about 6 months before our manager quit, resulting in some odd changes and within a week, I stopped receiving shifts. Technically, I still work there, but I never work there, so I go day to day using the employee discount to get half priced coffee and free mark outs, quietly reminding their system that I’m technically an employee there. I’ve since gotten another job at a paper mill, and they love the coffee runs I do as often as needed.
4. You don't want this guy on your friends list.
I don't wish people happy birthday when Facebook notifies me.
5. Hopefully, Paradoxstax doesn't collect too many speeding tickets.
Whenever I get a ticket for speeding I pay 1€ more. The administration effort to pay back money to citizen is more expensive than 1€.
6. Coppergato will soon need to learn a few tricks from the #5 dude.
I drive three miles per hour over the speed limit. Take that, South Carolina Highway Patrol!
7. "Ex-Step dad" explains it all, Spoon_Elemental.
My Ex-Step dad was a smoker and was not allowed to smoke in the house. One day, just to get to me he walked in and started blowing smoke straight in my face and the aired out the house and sprayed air freshener to cover it up. After he left I took some of his cigarettes and lit them and then dumped a little bit of the ashtray from outside on the couch. When my mom got back I didn't even need to say anything. She immediately blamed him for the smell and leftover ash and he couldn't call me out on it because he thought he had just overlooked the ash.
Another time he decided I had been on my computer for too long and shut off the power in the fuse box to force me to get off..... And I stayed on my computer because it was a laptop.
8. SirChoGath is probably a TV aficionado.
When Best Buy sells me a warranty on a very expensive TV only to turn around and not do their part because the sales associate "Sold me the wrong warranty". I just bought the same TV, took it apart, put all the new parts in mine, and returned the new one with the old parts.
9. Holdingdownback would probably throw an oven pizza into a microwave.
I don't preheat the oven before I cook an oven pizza, I just set the timer for a minute or two longer. #fuckthesystem
ITT: people concerned about the quality of my food. I'm a broke college kid, I don't give a shit if my pizza wouldn't win a prize lol
Edit: Reddit is advertising /r/pizza to me now. Apparently I have offended the pizza gods.
10. SasquatchTaxidermist's high school teacher is one of those.
I had a teacher in high school who had a master plan of taking down Starbucks by taking all of their napkins. For our exams, if you brought in a stack of their napkins, you would get extra credit. Whenever you turned in an assignment late, Starbucks napkins had to be turned in with it. Last time I saw his stash it filled up two 8' tall cabinets.
11. Fugazithehax desires NSFW episodes while at work, sometimes.
Every once in a while I'll "work from home" for a day and fuck my wife while getting paid for it.
12. Korythosaurus is actually all of us when it comes to cheating the movies.
I bring my own snacks to the theater. Also, I used my student ID to get discounts at tons of places when I wasn't a student, especially at the movie theater.
13. VictoricRong's parents are total muggles.
I started reading Harry Potter. When I was younger my parents were insanely religious. I have always loved to read but I wasn't necessarily super into magic or fantasy. I didn't even really want to read the books until the pastor at our church mentioned them in a sermon and then my parents forbade me and my siblings from reading them. My siblings were in high school and honesty didn't seem to care, but I was curious. Why couldn't I read them? Were they that bad? All my classmates were reading the first or second book. I rode my bike to the local library and checked the first one out. I kept it hidden in my closet and only read it at night by flashlight or while I was in the bathroom.
Eventually, I got an overdue phone call from the library while I was at school and my mom found out. I was so grounded, and she monitored what I brought home from the library from then on. However, she couldn't monitor what I was checking out from the school library. That's how I became the kid who read at recess and started to rebel against my folks.
Edit: Oh wow! Thanks for the gold internet stranger! I'm glad you enjoyed my little act of rebellion! So glad I fought the power. :D
Bonus points, I said I was going to Monsters Inc, but I snuck into Harry Potter since they opened the same weekend. Eleven year old on fire.
14. Darium4 is probably a shitty roommate.
When it's my roommate's turn to buy toilet paper and we run out, I buy some for myself and keep it hidden in my room until he gets more.
15. Idyegrass can discover amusement in the littlest of things.
As a kid my mom told me to "go to your room and don't make a sound." So I wrote out "a sound" on a piece if paper and snickered to myself.
16. Firesoups would make a wonderful parent.
When I was 16 and working as a cashier in a drive thru, if I could hear kids in the car and the parents were rude to me, I would put an extra toy in one bag, and no toy in another bag.
17. Kawawabear11 is human.
DO NOT TOUCH
18. Cowbelle14 and #15 would get along well with each other.
When I was a little kid (4 or younger, I'd say) kid, my mom used to take naps in the afternoons when my baby brother would be sleeping as well. She would try and get me to take a nap with her to keep an eye on me, but I was never a napper as a kid. I wouldn't be tired and I'd move around restlessly. She'd get irritated and tell me to be still, so I'd wiggle my toes in rebellion. She never knew.
19. Brickwall5 relishes his own ignoble actions and motives.
Sometimes I look up how to make bombs or other sketchy shit right before I masturbate. I use my phone for porn; so I do this in hopes that the terrorism alert will make the NSA turn on my phone's camera and microphone only to tune in to my fat, sweaty self jerkin it.
20. Askmeaboutinkl is a borderline Luddite.
I refuse to update my iOS. TAKE THAT, APPLE.
21. Forget coupons, let ClosetMugger be your grocery shopping buddy instead.
My local supermarket charges extra for any chilled drinks. Whenever, I want to buy chilled drinks, I would use the self-checkout machine since the machine can't detect whether it's cold or not.
22. You will soon find PotsAndOwls in this Someecards vertical.
Sometimes, late at night, after coming to a complete stop and really checking that there's no one around, I drive through a red light.
Take that society!
23. Molonym2 will make you get rid of this bathroom accessory.
I always use the fancy towels in people's bathrooms that are supposed to only be for decoration.
24. Shh, Fluffyfishbasket. The banks will hear.
When the bank lays out candy so you can take one, I take a handful, while maintaining unbreaking eye contact with the teller.
25. J_freakin_d has "spite socks" because grandma has favorites.
We used to have an extended family Christmas party (Grandma, Grandpa, Aunts, and Uncles) where all of the kids would give gifts to each other and Grandma and Grandpa would also buy gifts for all of the grandkids. I was maybe 10 years old and the youngest of three when this particular incident happened. I have one older brother and one older sister. Grandma - who did all of the buying - bought all of the older boys tools or hunting equipment except my brother. She gave him a noticeably used reversible belt. Grandma gave all of the girls a piece of her antique serving dishes and china except my sister. She gave her a plastic serving tray. Grandma gave all of the younger boys a toy vehicle of some sort except for me. She gave me used knitted orange, brown, and white socks. It took me many years to realize that these gifts were a big "fuck you" to our family.
After I realized the dig at our family I have made sure to wear those ugly ass socks every winter. Every. Fucking. Winter. Do you think those other gifts are still around? Nope. But my "fuck you" socks are keeping my feet nice and warm. I'm nearly 40 now.
Edit: Here they are! In their magnificent glory. They are made a little thicker on the bottoms and the top cuff. Beautiful Christmas Socks.
26. Craftychicken91 and #9 are probably best bros in real life.
I work at a pizza place and every time I have to go into the cooler for ANYTHING I will reach into the Pepperonis and eat 1. every little circle of meat tastes like "sticking it to the man"
27. That's why Rebelchampion is a rebel champion.
Sometimes, you have to do the absolute bare minimum of your job description all day, and clock out exactly on time whether the job was completed or not.
Deny me the one day off I've asked for in two years. Fuck you.