Haircuts are an important part of most people's lives, but just like everything else in the world, they aren't always good. Whether it's because you went to a new stylist, did it yourself, or had a friend give it a try (goodbye, friendship), haircuts and color don't always turn out like you planned. Sometimes, the plan was bad to begin with. Here are some "When Haircuts Attack" stories. Spoiler: there's a lot of crying involved.
1. When you try to go blonde using a drugstore kit.
2. When the salon owner mistakes lightening powder for organic conditioner.
In 2014, aspiring Brazilian model Myrella Ikeda sued Antonio Luis Rosa and Jonice Padilha, the co-owners of salon J. Sisters, after Ikeda went in for a haircut and left with significantly less hair—but due to scissors. Rosa told Ikeda he was going to hydrate her hair with an organic product, but instead accidentally used Naturlite White Lightening Powder, which is basically bleach. WHOOPS!
According to the lawsuit, "Ikeda felt like he was putting fire or rubbing hot pepper into her head. Rosa told Ikeda it was 'normal,' and 'don’t worry.'" He then left the product in her hair for an hour. After he washed it out, he tried to use a straightening iron on it. “Immediately, her hair started to fall, burnt and crumbled.” Ikeda said her hair grew back, but it's now thinner and her scalp is still partly numb.
3. When you try to do your roots.
4. When it rains on your hair parade.
(from Pagan-za on Reddit)
I had actually forgotten about this memory. We went to some party or event as teenagers and decided it would be cool to make our hair blue. So we used blue hair colouring, and it actually turned out ok. Until later on at the actual event, [when] it started raining. I looked like a smurf for a week.
5. When you think you can do your own ombre (spoiler alert: you can't.)
6. When even the salon can't tell what color they were going for.
I left the salon with roots that were lightened, a band of orange and dingy purple desperately clinging to my fried ends.
I should have known the appointment was going to be a disaster when the apprentice thought scrubbing my freshly bleached hair and scalp like an iron pan was a good idea. They toned me three times, which was a huge red flag that something wasn’t right; in the four-plus years I’ve had platinum hair, I’ve never been toned three times.
I was hoping as I dried my hair myself (it’s now 25 bucks to have someone blow dry your hair at this salon) that it would even out and lighten up. The head colour technician walked with a look of horror but said nothing.
I was in complete shock. As I went downstairs to collect my things, the lady working the coat check asked me what colour my hair was supposed to be. Not a good sign. As I cashed out, I saw the receptionist give me a quick up-down look of pity before she composed herself and asked me for my $130—which was also a shock to me, as it had been $70 before (the reason I went to this salon in the first place).
7. When you want to look hot but not in a way that burns.
(via SunnyLego on Reddit)
The first time I ever had it bleached. Was a teen going from dark brown natural hair to purple. Was sitting there, and bleach started burning tons, sat there a bit more thinking "Am I just being a wuss?" asked my boyfriend, he touched my hair and burnt his hand. They rushed me to the sink, and I heard a huge "WOAH!" when they put water on to rinse, because it all steamed up. I was sitting there thinking.. "Do I still have hair?" Yes I did, but ended up with a shorter haircut than planned...
8. When you were doomed from the start.
(via Delightfully on Reddit)
I am a natural blonde and dyed my hair for most of high school. I had a bit of a deep cappuccino brown going on.
I decided it wasn't worth keeping up with the roots anymore and wanted to go back to blonde. Knowing that if I let it grow out, I'd have a super weird reverse ombre going on, so I went out and bought de-colorizer. My hair turned white at the top, gradually turning bright orange the closer you came towards the ends. It had uneven spots all over and looked a little like a very ill leopard.
Knowing I couldn't go outside like that, I bought a light brown dye and immediately dyed over it. It was obviously too light to hide it all, so I still had uneven spots.
Next day, terrified little me only went to the first class of high school and then decided to go out to the hairdresser. Hairdresser decided the best way to fix it was to literally paint it BLACK and then add in blonde highlights (YES F*CKING PEROXIDE IN MY ALREADY DEAD HAIR) that started somewhere a few inches down my actual roots, so it looked really weird. She charged me 200 euros for the dye job too. I don't even know how I managed to get it back to blonde eventually, but I did.
...And that's how I spent over a thousand bucks on revitalizing my hair in the last few years.
9. When there's no going back.
10. When you ask for "just a trim." Lol.
(via bonobo_phone on Reddit)
I went in to Sport Clip for a trim ("oh, yeah, they do cheap women's haircuts too!"). My hair is about armpit length, I wanted a half-inch trim that kept my inch-deep layers. She gave me a half-inch trim that brought my layers up above my earlobes. It was half Rachel, half mullet. I cried.
11. When there's an actual nightmare on your head.
12. When the stylist gets distracted.
(via Anon_E_moose on Reddit)
Went to my usual lady. Told her 'the usual', which was shoulder length with long layers. Took a phone call from angsty teenage son. Looked up to see she'd given me a Carol Brady. Cried for two days.
13. When the stylist has ideas of his own.
(via KateKillz on Reddit)
A new hair salon opened up near or house that advertised $5 hair cuts. We were pretty poor, so my mom brought us there. The catch was that the stylist would ignore what you told him and 'felt the inspiration' to make you look fabulous however he saw fit.
While making small talk he found out that my brother is gay. 20 minutes later, Bam! Unsolicited pink weave.
14. When you might have to stage an intervention for the stylist.
(via zygote_harlot on Reddit)
As she was cutting my hair, she said 'If I had to cut hair for the rest of my life I'd kill myself.'
15. When mom gets involved.
(via littlebloodmage on Reddit)
I used to have shoulder-length hair. My mom, who has 0 hair styling experience, decides out of the blue to give me a Fantasia Burrino (who at the time had just won American Idol) haircut. The end result was a military style crew cut. I got mistaken for a boy for months on end.
16. When your stylist is Randy Quaid fan.
(via BossVal on Reddit)
The cut I received was a bit like a pixie and a shag had a child, but then left it alone with a lawnmower. My hair was chin length at the longest part, and without tons of product to weigh it down would frequently puff out sideways leaving me looking like Randy Quaid in Kingpin.
17. When someone messes up your bangs.
18. When you try to cut your own bangs.
(via CumquatDangerpants on Reddit)
I was twelve and wanted those long bangs that was in style (like on either side of my face. I took scissors and clipped them myself. I ended up looking like a bad mark Hamill haircut.
19. When you don't learn from other martyrs who have tried to cut their own bangs.
(via hubbleisland on Reddit)
Tried to cut my bangs myself. WORST idea ever. Literally cut the ENTIRE front part off. 4 inches of hairline completely gone. Had to wear a headband to cover it up for almost a year. Absolutely mortifying and I am never cutting my own hair again.
20. When you refuse to listen about not cutting your own bangs.
21. When you get all DIY with the buzzer.
(via papercowmoo on Reddit)
If you think that's bad, check out what I did to myself during my second year of college. I went to work every day like that for a month before it grew out enough to the point where it wasn't that noticeable.
22. When you the metric system bites you in the ass.
(via glah_king on Reddit)
I live in the US, went to a barber in Europe while on business trip. When I told what length to cut my hair, I gave it in American standards. When the barber started cutting, it was way shorter than I remembered. Then, I realized that size 6 in Europe is 6 millimeters, not 6th of an inch. As he finished cutting, I looked in the mirror, and I've never seen my veins in my head so blue.
TL;DR Forgot about the metric system, became an accidental skinhead.
23. When your barber is a sadist.
(via Harmelion on Reddit)
I had always gone to the same place to get my haircut growing up, and the guy just knew what I wanted to look like, so I never had to ask for anything specific. I moved for college so I had to find a barber.
I knew a 1 was short, but I thought that a 2 would be like . . . medium. So I asked for a 1 on the sides and a 2 up top, thinking I would get my usual. The guy looked at me and said "Wow, really? That short?", and my hair was pretty long at that time so I was just like "Yeah, totes man."
So he went to town on my hair, and eventually he started up top, while I just stared with my best poker face, not wanting people to know how stupid I was. At the end, he said "Well there you go! A one and a two!" with this inflection in his voice that implied that he knew that I knew that I just fucked up. He asked if it was okay and I was like "Yeah man, perfect, hahaha!", and then I paid and went home and cried.
24. When you think a perm might be a good idea.
(via FlatCatShop on Reddit)
Went in for a body wave a month before my honeymoon. Stylist says 'Sure, no problem! I can do that!' and proceeds to pull out teeny tiny fish-bone sized rollers. Rolls up my hair and leaves me sitting there soaking in perming solution. After all the rollers were taken out, my hair is clearly NOT in a body wave - it's in the tightest 80's spiral perm imaginable. Tell the stylist this isn't what I wanted, he says 'Don't worry, this is just what it looks like at first! It'll loosen up!'
It didn't loosen up. Kept my hair in a bun for an entire year until I said to hell with the whole thing and got a pixie cut. For four years, my passport photo reflected that awful, AWFUL perm.
25. When you realize a perm is actually the worst idea.
(via chiflower on Reddit)
My grandfather often took me to get my hair braided for the summer, so he wouldn't have to deal with it. After a few summers of getting my scalp tortured by heavy-handed ladies, I asked for a perm. He took me to a nice old Korean lady who was a friend of his. This wonderful old lady unfortunately knew nothing about textured hair. After 20 mins with the perm in I was crying to have it out. She just smeared some Vaseline on my edges. When it finally got washed out I had a huge round part of my scalp that was burned away. By some miracle my hair was still there but underneath my scalp was a matted scab for months; years later combing it too hard would reopen the wound. Never again.
26. When you are maybe not clear about what look you are going for.
(via Seventeen magazine)
I go to the hairstylist for every dance in high school. It's my one splurge! By now, most of the stylists know that I like my hair in an up do, curled, sometimes with a few loose pieces. Unfortunately, on my last visit, I must not have specified exactly what I was looking for. When they spun my chair around, I had cornrows! I'm a redhead with pale skin that does not need to show on top of my head. You can imagine my shock.
27. When the styling product is blood.
(via skulk on Reddit)
I was 10ish and too shy to say anything. The stylist cut the hand she was using to hold my hair between her thumb and pointer with the scissors. It started to gush blood and she RAN HER BLEEDING HAND back through my hair a few more times before noticing and applying a way too small bandaid. I was horrified.
28. When the barber is a little overeager.
(via Back2bach on Reddit)
He asked me to tilt my head back, just to check for any nose-hair. There was none, but his electric razor hit against the side my interior nasal passage and caused a blood vessel to erupt - spewing blood all over.
29. When you try to console yourself with "it's just hair."
(Luckily, it is!)