Heathrow Airport commissioned a report on worldwide lipstick trends, because airports and lipstick go together like... train stations and eyeshadow?
Here is what the world would look like if some countries and cities were smothered to death with massive amounts of lipstick. DO YOU LIKE MAKEUP NOW?
(via Heathrow Airport)
Of course, the real reason Heathrow Airport commissioned the report, entitled "Lipstick Colours of the Year," is because the airport is apparently trying to promote itself as a beauty shopping mecca. The idea of buying cosmetics at the airport blows my mind — if I buy a bottle of water at the airport, it's $4.50. How much would a goddamn tube of lipstick cost? I'd probably have to sell my plane ticket just to pay for it. Heathrow is marketing to a category of rich that I've never even thought of before: "I'm going to shop at the airport" rich.
Anyway, Heathrow commissioned this report package, which includes a history of lipstick, an artist carving small replicas of worldwide landmarks into lipstick (because why?), and "the top lip colour worn by women in 50 stylish destinations that Heathrow flies to." Those are as follows:
I hope Heathrow also starts providing Cosmo-style sex tips. (via Heathrow Airport)
I simultaneously find this report interesting and hate it. I love wearing lipstick but feel icky when someone gives me a marketing-voiced, "you go girl" lipstick manifesto to try to get me to go shopping for goddamn beauty products at a goddamn airport. Like this shit:
Heathrow offers an amazing range of lipstick shades and textures so you won't have to look far to find one that will light up your face — and possibly your life.
Plus, there are weird moments that just seem so disconnected from real women, like this suggestion for trying to figure out your skin tone: "Hold some silver and gold fabric up to your face. If gold looks better, you're 'warm'; silver, you're 'cool'." Maybe I'm just bad at being a girl, so let me ask all of you other ladies this — do y'all just have both silver and gold clothing hanging in your closet? If so, why? Do you worry that you could be called upon to play a human statue at any moment?
Anyway, if you want to look at the report yourself, you can learn techniques for using five of the most popular colors and also be told to "Keep channelling Kate Moss," who was recently escorted off a plane for being drunk and disorderly, so she's definitely a great example for any airport promotion.