Study: All ground beef has poop in it. Yes, all of it.

Study: All ground beef has poop in it. Yes, all of it.
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And the study is from 'Consumer Reports,' so you know it's not bullsh*t. The study, that is. The sh*t could quite literally be bullsh*t.

Study: All ground beef has poop in it. Yes, all of it.

Ground beef: it sure can be delicious! And apparently, small amounts of poop can also be delicious when they're mixed in with ground beef. Consumer Reports went to 103 stores across the United States and bought almost 500 lbs of ground beef, including conventional and "more sustainable" beef. And "all 458 pounds of beef we examined contained bacteria that signified fecal contamination." If you're one of those people who enjoys making the people around you miserable, I suggest waiting until you're at a Labor Day barbecue to bring this up. While eating a veggie burger.

There were other concerns about the content of the beef beyond poop — 20% of samples contained a bacteria that causes food poisoning, and 10% had a toxin-creating bacteria. And while cooking beef properly will help you out with the bacteria, the toxin can't be cooked away. So that's a big ol' meaty pillow of comfort.

Consumer Reports' biggest takeaway from the study isn't that surprising: "One of the most significant findings of our research is that beef from conventionally raised cows was more likely to have bacteria overall, as well as bacteria that are resistant to antibiotics, than beef from sustainably raised cows." Basically, pay more for the organic, sustainably raised beef if you want less poop in your Hamburger Helper.

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