Sarah Palin and her family reportedly got into a drunken brawl in Alaska over the weekend.

Sarah Palin and her family reportedly got into a drunken brawl in Alaska over the weekend.
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Do you know who she is?! Do you know who she is?!

It's always difficult when our most cherished and respected public figures get caught up in the baser skirmishes of everyday life. Of course we like to imagine that these pillars of society are somehow above drunken fistfights and screaming matches. But it would appear that even a family as revered and celebrated as the Palins can sometimes find themselves caught up in a little alcohol-fueled drama.

According to the Anchorage Police Department's Case No. 14-36989, several officers "responded to a report of a verbal and physical altercation taking place between multiple subjects outside of a residence... Some of the Palin family members were in attendance at the party."

No big deal, right? Sarah Palin can't help it if some crazy fight breaks out at the same soirée at which she and her family members are drinking wine and discussing the collected memoirs of Winston Churchill, can she?

Except, according to multiple reports, the Palins were not simply active participants in said fisticuffs, they were instigators. There's this account from an Alaska political blogger:

Track Palin stumbles out of a stretch Hummer, and immediately spots an ex-boyfriend of Willow’s. Track isn’t happy with this guy, the story goes. There’s words, and more. The owner of the house gets involved, and he probably wished he hadn't. At this point, he’s up against nearly the whole Palin tribe: Palin women screaming. Palin men thumping their chests. Word is that Bristol has a particularly strong right hook, which she employed repeatedly, and it’s something to hear when Sarah screams, “Don’t you know who I am!” And it was particularly wonderful when someone in the crowd screamed back, “This isn’t some damned Hillbilly reality show!” ... Track was seen on the street, shirtless, flipping people off, with Sarah right behind him, and Todd somewhere in the foreground, tending to his bloody nose. 

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As well as this one from another Alaska blogger:

Track had some altercation with a person who may or may not have once dated one of the Palin girls. That led to some pushing and shoving, which escalated somehow to the family being asked to leave the premises. However before that could happen a certain former abstinence spokesperson unleashed a flurry of blows at some as of yet identified individual before being pulled off by by another partygoer, after which Todd apparently puffed up his chest and made some threatening remarks.

And this comment on the same blog:

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[S]tories... are continuing to bubble to the surface now about the Palin's wild weekend at a Wasilla soiree: Bristol punching people, the Todd with a bloody lip, Track trying to pick up a chick for a quickie and Sarah herself screeching profanity at the offenders. It didn't make the police blotter, but people are talking.

It truly saddens me to have to write of such sordid tales concerning some of the finest patriots ever to step foot on hallowed U.S. soil. Although, it may seem inconceivable that Todd Palin could get into a brawl, or that America's sweetheart Bristol Palin could unloose a barrage of haymakers upon a fellow partygoer, or that the former Governor of Alaska herself could try to exert her influence upon Anchorage's finest, we might have to face the reality that these people are only human. And we shouldn't allow it to change our deep affection for them and their unparalleled moral insights.

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(by Dennis DiClaudio)

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