Doctors say if your crotch itches, delete Tinder.

Doctors say if your crotch itches, delete Tinder.
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Doctors are seeing a boom in STDs thanks to hookup apps like Grindr and Tinder.

Doctors say if your crotch itches, delete Tinder.

Remember: no one ever caught gonorrhea from a Snapchat. Stay safe out there.
(via Thinkstock)

Much like every movie from decades ago getting their own reboots, sexually transmitted diseases that you forgot all about are coming back on the scene with a vengeance. Doctors in Rhode Island say the resurgence of syphilis, gonorrhea, and even HIV owe a great deal to apps that make it easy for you to have sex with strangers.

Some of you might be thinking "duh." Others might be making an appointment with your doctor right now. Others, still, are trying to seal the deal with clever lines, regardless of some smartypants doctors!

In Rhode Island alone, there was a 79% increase in syphilis starting in 2013. This kind of jump in STDs hasn't been seen since the start of Craigslist Casual Encounters. Really. The same thing happened in 2008. People just get too excited to use new, easy ways to hook up.

I think the real lesson here is: don't hook up with people in Rhode Island.

Also, whether you use dating apps or not: before screwing a complete stranger, take a few precautions like condoms or (LOL!) dental dams (In all seriousness, you should use one, even if you haven't seen one since the first trip to your college health center).

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This is a rough story, I know. It is however the perfect opportunity to unveil my new, safer hookup app for dry-humping only called Drinder. Free trial for thirty days. Just send me your email and a photo and I'll let you know who's interested (I'm currently the only one on it).

Reminder: if the STDs don't kill you, these people might.

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