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Not gonna push that button.
Not gonna push that button.

I'm feeling pretty chill right now. I'm wearing new pants that fit. I made a point during a work meeting that was met with knowing nods. When I looked in the mirror, I didn't think "hello, human eclair."

I'm looking for the words to explain this sudden calm and confidence. I feel safe. But I know that won’t last. I’m due for a sweat-inducing, eyeball-rattling, bed-hugging panic attack any minute. A real humdinger of a downward spiral that will send me into the sheltering arms of Netflix. Seriously, what is it called when you’re not having a panic attack?