You know how hearing or seeing someone vomit can actually trigger your own nausea? Luckily, that never happens when just reading about an up-chuck. Well, hopefully it doesn't. Here are some of the most extraordinary vom-stories, taken from a few soaking, chunky AskReddit threads. Good luck.
1. ChorroVon explains why sometimes you should try to eat sushi in two separate bites.
Sushi restaurant with a coworker having lunch. I sneezed and caused a piece of wasabi to fly into my sinus cavity. My pain threshold was almost instantly maxed out and I ended up spewing yellowtail all over the table in front of me. From an outside perspective it looked something like this.
Ah! AH! AAAAH!!
And as you turn around to looks you see a loudly crying and vomiting man trying to get up and get to the restroom as fast as possible.
It's always seemed unfair that you have to shove the entire piece of sushi in your mouth to eat it.
Is throwing up at the table actually less rude than laughing in the face of sushi-etiquette? Smaller bites for greater safety, everyone.
2. Imposter24 made his throw up do the slinky trick.
- The top of the stairs, so it cascaded to the bottom like a magnificent pungent waterfall
- My best friend's shoes
You know, the slinky trick:
Or picture Alex Mack as her goo alter ego sliding down the stairs.
3. You might think LH44Gooner's story is cruel, but—well, yeah. It's cruel.
But this guy's comment in crueler:
4. Wsumommy probably should have moved away.
Imagine being haunted by your own vomit every time you took a walk. Usually that's only the case when you're hung over.
5. IamBZ is either a liar or the most interesting vomiter in the world.
Got sick and puked on both the Great Wall of China and Machu Picchu, but probably the most inappropriate was over the side of a boat on to a great white shark.
Is it sad that I saw this thread and thought, "oh I got this one!"
6. This guy turned an all-you-can-eat buffet into an all-you-already-ate slopfest.
Gotta think it looked something like this:
7. Brospehgordanlevitt makes the list for his popularization of the term "hand bombed."
It's no doubt a useful term to have in the personal lexicon.
8. Thtstz's wife turned some finger paintings into some experimental performance art.
So creative. Great art. Worth thousands. Said one commenter:
9. Not sure why they threw him out; elomretep was just making it rain.
10. Now this is a game that no one should play. Because it is gross.
11. And just in case you thought you weren't going to learn something today, there's this from HotHandsHanon:
Foolproof method. It's an elaboration on "hand bombed" that should be called "shoe bombed"—unless that's got some other connotation. In that case, you can just call this disgusting.