17 Festivus gifts for the 'Seinfeld' fan in your life.

17 Festivus gifts for the 'Seinfeld' fan in your life.

Festivus, a holiday made popular by Seinfeld, gets bigger and bigger every year. Fans celebrate "Festivus for the rest of us" every December 23rd, by gathering around a stark aluminum pole, airing their grievances, and performing feats of strength. Yes, buying Festivus gifts kind of defeats the the whole purpose of the holiday, but who cares? Here are 15 gift ideas for the Seinfeld superfan in your life. Happy Festivus!

1. Mini Festivus Pole

Great gift for someone who lives in a tiny apartment or has a slutty Elf on the Shelf.

Because tinsel is distracting.

2. Festivus Doggy shirt 

He's been airing his grievances, all over the living room carpet.

Great gift for your dog, who won't stop barking because he loves Festivus (or hates you.)

3. Frank Costanza Doll

"Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reached for the last one they had, but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way." -Frank Costanza 

Great gift for any child you want to disappoint, confuse, or terrify this holiday season.

4. Soup Nazi Soup Spoons

No soup for you, but luckily these spoons can be used for non-soup activities like ice cream, pudding, and balancing on your nose.

Great gift for anyone you want to spoon.

5. Kramer's License Plate

Fun fact: These are Kanye West's actual plates.

Remember when Kramer accidentally got issued a proctologist's license plates? Now, you can give these to someone you love on purpose!

6. Jerry's Puffy Shirt

Can also double as a Prince costume.

The person you buy this for may say, "but I don't want to be a pirate." But that's just too damn bad, Grandpa. You're getting a puffy shirt, and you're going to like it.


7. George Costanza Earrings

These earrings are real, and they're spectacular.

George is getting upset, but the person you give these earrings to won't be.

8. Festivus Feats of Strength Champion T-shirt​

Great gift for the family bad ass, who will immediately cut the sleeves off. 

Stop crying and fight your father for this t-shirt.

9. Festivus Brunch at the Renaissance Hotel 


Buy your family drinks like The Junior Mint, The Cozmo, and The Pez while you tell them how much they've wronged you.

11. Festivus Baby Bib

Baby's totally going to eat it in the feats of strength competition.

Give this gift to the new baby in your life, so they can learn disappointment.

12. George Tattoo

Give someone the gift they can never ever return.


13. A pair of Festivus Boxers for dad.

He probably ripped his trying to pin you to the ground. 

14. And some for mom too.

OK, now it's just getting weird. 

15. Festivus Sweatshirt


This is a great gift for the fashionista in your life. 

16. Donation to the Human Fund

When you care enough to give nothing.

Print out these cards from the fictional charity George invented for everyone you know. You'll look charitable, and keep all the money for yourself.

17. And don't forget to wrap it all up in Festivus wrapping paper. 

What's the deal with wrapping paper?