life

<p>Some divorced parents try to keep it civil for their kids &mdash; but some would rather never speak to their former spouse again.</p><p>This man is part of the second group. He wants to demand that his ex stop sitting with him at their child&#39;s sporting events, but he&#39;s not sure if that would be out of line. He <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/kdekx3/aita_for_telling_my_exwife_not_to_sit_with_me_at/">posted on Reddit </a>to get some advice.</p><h2>The exes have &quot;an icy relationship&quot;:</h2><blockquote> <p>One of our kids is 16 and plays soccer. I go to every game possible. His mom and I have an icy relationship that&#39;s best when we have minimal contact. The last four times I let my guard down, she burned me. She apologized and I got over it, but it started to become a habit and a waste of my time and money.</p> </blockquote><h2>But the ex seems to want him to be less distant:</h2><blockquote> <p>She has been wondering why I&#39;ve been distant from her (i.e. refuse to take her calls and tells her to email me) and it&#39;s made my life a lot easier. The only time when I actually have to see her is at our son&#39;s games.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>Now he&#39;s wondering if it would be okay to ban her from his side at games:</h2><blockquote> <p>I really really really don&#39;t want her to sit by me. I don&#39;t want to see her, talk to her or even know she is there. I feel like this is the one-time when I need to be real with her. It feels very high schoolish but I can&#39;t stand her.</p> </blockquote><h2>The people of Reddit mostly agree that while it may be &quot;high schoolish,&quot; it&#39;s actually fine.</h2><p>IneffableB puts it simply:</p><blockquote> <p>The only thing you share is that you are both there to support your son. You don&rsquo;t need to be sitting together or engaging with each other to do that.</p> </blockquote><p>Baseballgirl30 speaks from experience:</p><blockquote> <p>as a child of divorce with parents who hate each other, seeing them together gives me monumental anxiety, so it might be a relief for your kid not to see you guys talking to each other.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>MissMurderpants suggests a few plans:</p><blockquote> <p>I get it. She sounds like she is emotionally /mentally abusing you and you are done.</p> <p>If you can&rsquo;t sit away from her as in she seeks you out. Get a buffer. A friend or two you can drag to the games that can sit next to you to block her.</p> </blockquote><p>They continue:</p><blockquote> <p>Or just say excuse me, I&rsquo;m watching Son play. Please leave me alone. Then you turn away. Always sit near people do if she causes a scene others will see.</p> <p>Get ear buds to block her talking.</p> <p>Only communicate thru that soo for divorced parents with shared custody</p> </blockquote><p>But some, like UKThrowaway909, say separating at games might make things awkward for the son:</p><blockquote> <p>While I agree I think OP needs to think about his son. What impact will it have when the kid finishes the game and wants to talk to his parents about the match, will he be made to feel like he&rsquo;s choosing favourites when he approaches one first. Will his team mates bully him because his parents can&rsquo;t even stand to sit near each other? Yes OP shouldn&rsquo;t have to deal with her but you can&rsquo;t ignore the potential impact it could have. Maybe worth setting much stricter boundaries with mum, ie you can sit near me but don&rsquo;t talk to me etc. Seems daft but kids can be cruel</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>And stopforgettingevery suggests they sit in the same vicinity:</p><blockquote> <p>my husband and I would sit near his ex so his son can easily spot us (versus having two different spots). It was far enough where small talk was hard. Or make sure there is a buffer between you. If sitting near her causes more negative feelings, that isn&rsquo;t healthy.</p> <p>That being said, make sure you pick important times for your kids to be able to be near with the ex. Championship games, big performances, graduations, marriage, etc.</p> </blockquote><p>Tinabird20 says it might be a good idea to try and get along with the ex better:</p><blockquote> <p>I feel like you probably need to figure out how to properly co parent. I&#39;m not sure how that happens or how bad things are. But, eventually you guys need to be on the same page for your child. However, I&#39;d rather have you not sit by her than cause tension and fighting that could be worse for the child.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>But baarelyalive says it&#39;s okay if this takes time:</p><blockquote> <p>it would be nice to show a united front for the kid, but not right now. Maybe one day. At his wedding perhaps.</p> </blockquote><h2>So there you have it. Divorced people need boundaries, too!</h2><p>Hope this former couple is able to coparent without drama.</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

Man asks if it would be wrong to tell his ex-wife she can't sit with him at their child's games.

Some divorced parents try to keep it civil for their kids &mdash; but some would rather never speak to their former spouse again.This man is part of the second group. He wants to demand that his ex stop sitting with him at their child&#39;s sporting events, but he&#39;s not sure if that would be out of line. He posted on Reddit to get some advice.The exes have &quot;an icy relationship&quot;: One of our kids is 16 and plays soccer. I go to every game possible. His mom and I have an icy relationship that&#39;s best when we have minimal contact. The last four times I let my guard down, she burned me. She apologized and I got over it, but it started to become a habit and a waste of my time and money. But the ex seems to want him to be less distant: She has been wondering why I&#39;ve been distant from her (i.e. refuse to take her calls and tells her to email me) and it&#39;s made my life a lot easier. The only time when I actually have to see her is at our son&#39;s games. Now he&#39;s wondering if it would be okay to ban her from his side at games: I really really really don&#39;t want her to sit by me. I don&#39;t want to see her, talk to her or even know she is there. I feel like this is the one-time when I need to be real with her. It feels very high schoolish but I can&#39;t stand her. The people of Reddit mostly agree that while it may be &quot;high schoolish,&quot; it&#39;s actually fine.IneffableB puts it simply: The only thing you share is that you are both there to support your son. You don&rsquo;t need to be sitting together or engaging with each other to do that. Baseballgirl30 speaks from experience: as a child of divorce with parents who hate each other, seeing them together gives me monumental anxiety, so it might be a relief for your kid not to see you guys talking to each other. MissMurderpants suggests a few plans: I get it. She sounds like she is emotionally /mentally abusing you and you are done. If you can&rsquo;t sit away from her as in she seeks you out. Get a buffer. A friend or two you can drag to the games that can sit next to you to block her. They continue: Or just say excuse me, I&rsquo;m watching Son play. Please leave me alone. Then you turn away. Always sit near people do if she causes a scene others will see. Get ear buds to block her talking. Only communicate thru that soo for divorced parents with shared custody But some, like UKThrowaway909, say separating at games might make things awkward for the son: While I agree I think OP needs to think about his son. What impact will it have when the kid finishes the game and wants to talk to his parents about the match, will he be made to feel like he&rsquo;s choosing favourites when he approaches one first. Will his team mates bully him because his parents can&rsquo;t even stand to sit near each other? Yes OP shouldn&rsquo;t have to deal with her but you can&rsquo;t ignore the potential impact it could have. Maybe worth setting much stricter boundaries with mum, ie you can sit near me but don&rsquo;t talk to me etc. Seems daft but kids can be cruel And stopforgettingevery suggests they sit in the same vicinity: my husband and I would sit near his ex so his son can easily spot us (versus having two different spots). It was far enough where small talk was hard. Or make sure there is a buffer between you. If sitting near her causes more negative feelings, that isn&rsquo;t healthy. That being said, make sure you pick important times for your kids to be able to be near with the ex. Championship games, big performances, graduations, marriage, etc. Tinabird20 says it might be a good idea to try and get along with the ex better: I feel like you probably need to figure out how to properly co parent. I&#39;m not sure how that happens or how bad things are. But, eventually you guys need to be on the same page for your child. However, I&#39;d rather have you not sit by her than cause tension and fighting that could be worse for the child. But baarelyalive says it&#39;s okay if this takes time: it would be nice to show a united front for the kid, but not right now. Maybe one day. At his wedding perhaps. So there you have it. Divorced people need boundaries, too!Hope this former couple is able to coparent without drama.

Some divorced parents try to keep it civil for their kids &mdash; but some would rather never speak to their former spouse again.  This man is part of the second group. He wants to demand that his ex stop sitting with him at their...