Lifestyle

<p>Uber, Lyft, and taxi drivers are heroes, who see us through our drunkest, most stressed-out times. They&#39;ve rushed you to the airport and chariotted you on your walk (drive?) of shame. Every driver deserves all the stars and tips to make a living, but especially these ones because they got jokes.</p><h2>1. Follow the beacon.</h2><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="reddit-card" > <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/flashlight/comments/js82dw/uber_eats_driver_couldnt_find_my_address_had_to/?ref_source=embed&amp;ref=share">Uber Eats driver couldn't find my address. Had to light the beacon.</a> from <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/flashlight/">flashlight</a> </blockquote> <script async src="https://embed.redditmedia.com/widgets/platform.js" charset="UTF-8"></script></div><h2>2. The ultimate DJ.</h2><figure class="image"><div class="image-container"><img alt="" data-attribution="Twitter" data-attribution-url="https://twitter.com/TEEJUS___/status/967554582401478656" height="290" src="//cdn.someecards.com/posts/screen-shot-2020-11-12-at-22554-pm-ZAsz8y.jpg" width="854" /></div><div class="image-attribution"><a href="https://twitter.com/TEEJUS___/status/967554582401478656">Twitter</a></div></figure><figure class="image"><div class="image-container"><img alt="" data-attribution="Twitter" data-attribution-url="https://twitter.com/TEEJUS___/status/967554582401478656" height="680" src="//cdn.someecards.com/posts/dw1xwkmvwaarwy9-w9D429.jpg" width="680" /></div><div class="image-attribution"><a href="https://twitter.com/TEEJUS___/status/967554582401478656">Twitter</a></div></figure><figure class="image"><div class="image-container"><img alt="" data-attribution="Twitter" data-attribution-url="https://twitter.com/TEEJUS___/status/967554582401478656" height="680" src="//cdn.someecards.com/posts/dw1xwkmuqaasmf7-VX7VC2.jpg" width="680" /></div><div class="image-attribution"><a href="https://twitter.com/TEEJUS___/status/967554582401478656">Twitter</a></div></figure><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p> </p><h2>3. Pick your flavor.</h2><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">last night my uber gave me a menu on what kind of ride i wanted , <a href="https://t.co/SMBBV4kVpu">pic.twitter.com/SMBBV4kVpu</a></p>&mdash; Łuí (@LuisLovesGoats) <a href="https://twitter.com/LuisLovesGoats/status/1100139542995058688?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">February 25, 2019</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><h2>4. A solid training regimen.</h2><figure class="image"><div class="image-container"><img alt="" data-attribution="Twitter" data-attribution-url="https://twitter.com/andrewolenski/status/484369870172475393" height="302" src="//cdn.someecards.com/posts/screen-shot-2020-11-12-at-15909-pm-sK8lN5.jpg" width="854" /></div><div class="image-attribution"><a href="https://twitter.com/andrewolenski/status/484369870172475393">Twitter</a></div></figure><h2>5. Raunchy.</h2><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-captioned data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/BZtqqttDb1G/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="13" style=" background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:658px; min-width:326px; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);"><div style="padding:16px;"> <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BZtqqttDb1G/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" style=" background:#FFFFFF; line-height:0; padding:0 0; text-align:center; text-decoration:none; width:100%;" target="_blank"> <div style=" display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"></div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style=" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"></div> <div style=" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"></div></div></div><div style="padding: 19% 0;"></div> <div style="display:block; height:50px; margin:0 auto 12px; width:50px;"><svg width="50px" height="50px" viewbox="0 0 60 60" version="1.1" xmlns="https://www.w3.org/2000/svg" xmlns:xlink="https://www.w3.org/1999/xlink"><g stroke="none" stroke-width="1" fill="none" fill-rule="evenodd"><g transform="translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)" fill="#000000"><g><path d="M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631"></path></g></g></g></svg></div><div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style=" color:#3897f0; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:550; line-height:18px;"> View this post on Instagram</div></div><div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"></div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"><div> <div style="background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"></div> <div style="background-color: #F4F4F4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"></div> <div style="background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"></div></div><div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style=" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"></div> <div style=" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg)"></div></div><div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style=" width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"></div> <div style=" background-color: #F4F4F4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"></div> <div style=" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"></div></div></div></a> <p style=" margin:8px 0 0 0; padding:0 4px;"> <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BZtqqttDb1G/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" style=" color:#000; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px; text-decoration:none; word-wrap:break-word;" target="_blank">I laughed my ass off with the Uber driver this morning. #justthetip #uberrides #nolalife</a></p> <p style=" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;">A post shared by <a href="https://www.instagram.com/linzzifer/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" style=" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px;" target="_blank"> Linzzifer</a> (@linzzifer) on <time style=" font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px;" datetime="2017-10-01T17:19:45+00:00">Oct 1, 2017 at 10:19am PDT</time></p></div></blockquote></div><h2>6. He ordered an Uber Doppelganger.</h2><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="reddit-card" > <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/9e9ycq/my_uber_driver_was_a_slimmer_cooler_mustached/?ref_source=embed&amp;ref=share">My Uber driver was a slimmer, cooler, mustached version of myself.</a> from <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/">pics</a> </blockquote> <script async src="https://embed.redditmedia.com/widgets/platform.js" charset="UTF-8"></script></div><h2>7. The cuckoos nest.</h2><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Flashback to when my uber had a bird in his car who looked just like Jack Nicholson <a href="https://t.co/9h7Eir1bSM">pic.twitter.com/9h7Eir1bSM</a></p>&mdash; dizzle_saint_james (@dizzle_st_james) <a href="https://twitter.com/dizzle_st_james/status/920875379413237760?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 19, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><p> </p><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>8. Southern hospitality!</h2><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="reddit-card" > <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/8v2568/welcome_to_the_peach_state_my_atlanta_lyft_driver/?ref_source=embed&amp;ref=share">Welcome to the Peach State! My Atlanta Lyft driver has peaches ready for her riders!</a> from <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/">pics</a> </blockquote> <script async src="https://embed.redditmedia.com/widgets/platform.js" charset="UTF-8"></script></div><h2>9. Enthusiasm is infectious.</h2><figure class="image"><div class="image-container"><img alt="" data-attribution="Twitter" data-attribution-url="https://twitter.com/EffiClaiir/status/1323976352983355395" height="304" src="//cdn.someecards.com/posts/screen-shot-2020-11-12-at-30803-pm-VwLxEj.jpg" width="852" /></div><div class="image-attribution"><a href="https://twitter.com/EffiClaiir/status/1323976352983355395">Twitter</a></div></figure><p><span style="color: rgb(74, 74, 74); font-family: BlinkMacSystemFont, -apple-system, &quot;Segoe UI&quot;, Roboto, Oxygen, Ubuntu, Cantarell, &quot;Fira Sans&quot;, &quot;Droid Sans&quot;, &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 1.35em; font-weight: 600; letter-spacing: -0.02em;">10. It&#39;s a bird, it&#39;s a plane...</span></p><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="reddit-card" > <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/92581z/my_uber_driver_was_dressed_like_superman/?ref_source=embed&amp;ref=share">My Uber driver was dressed like Superman</a> from <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/">pics</a> </blockquote> <script async src="https://embed.redditmedia.com/widgets/platform.js" charset="UTF-8"></script></div><h2>11. Need a hand?</h2><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="reddit-card" > <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/55e0ir/i_dont_think_the_uber_riders_will_find_my/?ref_source=embed&amp;ref=share">I don't think the Uber riders will find my Halloween decoration as funny as I do.</a> from <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/">funny</a> </blockquote> <script async src="https://embed.redditmedia.com/widgets/platform.js" charset="UTF-8"></script></div><h2>12. Extra stars for Dad Jokes.</h2><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="reddit-card" > <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/d0i3g1/my_uber_driver_told_me_that_there_is_water_bottle/?ref_source=embed&amp;ref=share">My uber driver told me that there is water bottle with &quot;your name&quot; on it under the seat and this is what I was given</a> from <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/">funny</a> </blockquote> <script async src="https://embed.redditmedia.com/widgets/platform.js" charset="UTF-8"></script></div><h2>13. Everything is better with burgers.</h2><figure class="image"><div class="image-container"><img alt="" data-attribution="Twitter" data-attribution-url="https://twitter.com/mariahclark75/status/1324736781716172801?s=20" height="390" src="//cdn.someecards.com/posts/screen-shot-2020-11-12-at-30919-pm-1xrDfi.jpg" width="848" /></div><div class="image-attribution"><a href="https://twitter.com/mariahclark75/status/1324736781716172801?s=20">Twitter</a></div></figure><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>14. Roasted.</h2><figure class="image"><div class="image-container"><img alt="" data-attribution="Twitter" data-attribution-url="https://twitter.com/iamalishajo/status/887076222580269058" height="198" src="//cdn.someecards.com/posts/screen-shot-2020-11-12-at-25904-pm-kZhPMA.jpg" width="848" /></div><div class="image-attribution"><a href="https://twitter.com/iamalishajo/status/887076222580269058">Twitter</a></div></figure><figure class="image"><div class="image-container"><img alt="" data-attribution="Twitter" data-attribution-url="https://twitter.com/iamalishajo/status/887076222580269058" height="1215" src="//cdn.someecards.com/posts/de-hgz7xcaevwqm-1-6n3bsp.jpg" width="1152" /></div><div class="image-attribution"><a href="https://twitter.com/iamalishajo/status/887076222580269058">Twitter</a></div></figure><h2>15. Gaga, ooh la la.</h2><figure class="image"><div class="image-container"><img alt="" data-attribution="Twitter" data-attribution-url="https://twitter.com/jesimangoss/status/1326676595986341889" height="344" src="//cdn.someecards.com/posts/screen-shot-2020-11-12-at-30634-pm-OirQmL.jpg" width="850" /></div><div class="image-attribution"><a href="https://twitter.com/jesimangoss/status/1326676595986341889">Twitter</a></div></figure><h2>16. The worst seat comes with rewards.</h2><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="reddit-card" > <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/7nbdon/found_this_sign_in_the_back_row_of_my_uber/?ref_source=embed&amp;ref=share">Found this sign in the back row of my Uber</a> from <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/">funny</a> </blockquote> <script async src="https://embed.redditmedia.com/widgets/platform.js" charset="UTF-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

16 of the funniest and most creative things Uber drivers have done to earn five stars.

Uber, Lyft, and taxi drivers are heroes, who see us through our drunkest, most stressed-out times. They&#39;ve rushed you to the airport and chariotted you on your walk (drive?) of shame. Every driver deserves all the stars and tips to make a living, but especially these ones because they got jokes.1. Follow the beacon. Uber Eats driver couldn't find my address. Had to light the beacon. from flashlight  2. The ultimate DJ.TwitterTwitterTwitter 3. Pick your flavor.last night my uber gave me a menu on what kind of ride i wanted , pic.twitter.com/SMBBV4kVpu&mdash; Łuí (@LuisLovesGoats) February 25, 2019 4. A solid training regimen.Twitter5. Raunchy.         View this post on Instagram           I laughed my ass off with the Uber driver this morning. #justthetip #uberrides #nolalife A post shared by  Linzzifer (@linzzifer) on Oct 1, 2017 at 10:19am PDT6. He ordered an Uber Doppelganger. My Uber driver was a slimmer, cooler, mustached version of myself. from pics  7. The cuckoos nest.Flashback to when my uber had a bird in his car who looked just like Jack Nicholson pic.twitter.com/9h7Eir1bSM&mdash; dizzle_saint_james (@dizzle_st_james) October 19, 2017  8. Southern hospitality! Welcome to the Peach State! My Atlanta Lyft driver has peaches ready for her riders! from pics  9. Enthusiasm is infectious.Twitter10. It&#39;s a bird, it&#39;s a plane... My Uber driver was dressed like Superman from pics  11. Need a hand? I don't think the Uber riders will find my Halloween decoration as funny as I do. from funny  12. Extra stars for Dad Jokes. My uber driver told me that there is water bottle with &quot;your name&quot; on it under the seat and this is what I was given from funny  13. Everything is better with burgers.Twitter14. Roasted.TwitterTwitter15. Gaga, ooh la la.Twitter16. The worst seat comes with rewards. Found this sign in the back row of my Uber from funny  

Uber, Lyft, and taxi drivers are heroes, who see us through our drunkest, most stressed-out times. They&#39;ve rushed you to the airport and chariotted you on your walk (drive?) of shame. Every driver deserves all the stars and tips to...