Not all therapists are saints like Robin Williams in Good Will Hunting. Therapists are people too, and they're doing the best not to let on the fact that they're judging you as you bare your soul.
This Reddit thread gave psychologists and other therapists a safe space to say everything they wish they could scream at their patients. Yes, everything is the parents' fault.
Your kid is sh*tty because you are sh*tty.
You’re a grown man, stop making your problems your mothers problems, she’s got good intentions but she’s enabling all your worst behaviors and addictions, and you know that you’re taking advantage of that.
To the mom: there’s no medal for “loving your son the most” you are an enabler, you acknowledged this. Which is a good first step, but if it does not change your behavior towards him, it’s meaningless. Stop making excuses for him, stop letting him take advantage of you. Because if you don’t, the rest of your family has stated that they are going to limit contact with you. You’re risking relationships with every other person in your life for an exploitative, codependent one with your son.